Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my mom has literally spent all her savings sending money to some bullshit-peddling megachurch televangelist, who apparently told her that giving them money would ensure her future fortune. Tithings, my ass. FML
Today, my wife handed over most of our son's college fund, in cash, to an investment scammer going by the name "Herp A. Derpson". FML
Today, my mother asked me if she could borrow $200. Being the lovely daughter I am, I gave her my bank card to withdraw it herself. She gambled it away and maxed my bank account out. I had $1500 saved. FML
Today, my nosy mom opened my mail and saw how much I have in my account. She confiscated my debit card because she’s convinced no one could save that much working part time at Burger King and is demanding I confess where so much money came from. I'm moving out. Fuck her. FML
Today, I overheard my mother Skyping with her new "boyfriend" about the $1,000 she just sent him. She barely knew what internet dating was three weeks ago. FML
Today, I found out that the $200 I reluctantly gave to my mother so she could rent a house was paid to a scammer. Now she wants to live with me, in my one bedroom apartment. FML
Today, I called my mother to check up on her. Lately, she's been having some financial problems, so last week I sent her my last $100 to help her out until her next paycheck. She used the money to euthanize the family dog. FML
Today, I gave my mother a pre-prepared deposit envelope with my fortnightly wage in it, in cash. I tell her exactly where the deposit box is and what to do. I'm now desperately calling the bank because my mother accidentely put my $1200 deposit in the little trash can for receipts under the ATM. FML
Today, my sisters and I pitched together nearly $500 to send my mom to the spa for Mother's Day. We put the printed sheet with her info into a little box with our card on top. When she opened it, she freaked out and started hugging my dad. Turns out he switched the cards and took all the credit. FML
Today, my mother, who religiously checks her bank account after every purchase, then shreds her receipts, got fed up with me not doing the same. So she shredded all my piled up receipts. These include the 100s of dollars I had spent for my work, which I need the receipts to get reimbursed for. FML
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Top comments
IKickPuppiesHard 16
And he would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids!
perdix 31
Why did you stop her? That sweet lady was just trying to help out Herpie's Kids.
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Comments (160)
kainpwnsu 19
I hope she's senile or something.
scuttlebuttz 1
And I would have gotten away with it too...
hendersh 0
I did that too!
brez_99 0
Don't really care how creepy this may sound.. I had to make an account for the sole purpose of complimenting you on your grammar. ^__^
nerdy96birdy 8
It would be funny if that actually was someone's name
hazelsun41311 0
DERP ._.
747pc 1
Guess who hasnt heard of reddit
CyberPunkTink 0
This is why I hate and love humanity. Kudos to the Herp McDerpington for being smart enough to trick the nimrods of our society, and for you for stopping your mom. Your mom needs to get off the face of this earth, along with the other people who fall for these scams. That is all my dears.
lea3829 7
haha derpin
herpdeladerp 0
Herp de la derp.