Today, I came up with a new system: If I want to buy something, I must do a chore first. I thought my laziness would keep me from impulsive shopping. Instead, my entire apartment is sparkling clean. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I recently quit doing housework in protest at my husband's laziness around the house, forcing him to start pulling his weight. The house has never been so clean. Apparently, most of the mess was caused by me moving things to clean around them and making the mess worse. FML
Today, I realized I'm so tired of cleaning houses all day to come home to a dirty house that I don't have the energy to clean. I need to hire my own cleaning lady. FML
Today, I was formally diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive tendencies. My mom saw this as an excuse to make me clean the whole house top to bottom, because "Hey, you love to clean." FML
Today, I cleaned my room, which I’d been putting off for ages. Halfway through, I sat down “just for a second” to check my phone. Two hours later, I was still scrolling, surrounded by half-sorted piles of stuff. When my roommate walked in and asked if I was reorganizing or giving up, I didn’t know. FML
Today, my mom told me to clean the house up because she wants to make good impression on the cleaning lady. FML
Today, after leaving for a two-week-trip, and thinking this time my mom would finally have no choice but to clean the dirty toilet herself for once, because I’ve been doing it the entire year, along with most other chores, I think you can guess what I did first thing upon my return. FML
Today, after losing my job, my apartment and my man, I had to move back in with my mom, at 37. She’s a total slob; I can’t function without clean, organized spaces. So, hey, at least I have a new full-time job now: cleaning up after her. FML
Today, I spent the day busting my butt to clean the house. As I tumbled into bed at the end of the day, exhausted, my wife looked at me and said, "Maybe you can get something done tomorrow?" FML
Today, I hired a cleaner to clean my apartment so when my in-laws visited tonight, they wouldn't think I was lazy. I got home from work, the cleaner hadn't shown at all, and my in-laws had arrived early. My mother-in-law is now mopping the floors. FML
Today, I cleaned my 21 year-old son's bedroom from top to bottom. When he got home from work all he could do was complain that the clothes that were on his "floordrobe"’ were "only worn once." This was my only day off, so why do I bother? FML
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Top comments
Kayla Jones 9
Well at least there's a good outcome.
Lee Elliott 4
hey, sounds good. you've got a clean apartment, and there is an upper limit to your impulse buying potential, given there's only so many chores in a day.
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Comments (19)
Kayla Jones 9
Well at least there's a good outcome.
BTK4399 14
Well yeah but money is lost
Lobby_Bee 18
Rewards is a great way to motivate yourself. I reward myself a good wank only if I can find the perfect never-before-seen **** clip.
DraconicFeline 31
That just means you have the discipline to follow through on your self-imposed restrictions. Adjust them a little to get the results you want, and I call that a win.
Lee Elliott 4
hey, sounds good. you've got a clean apartment, and there is an upper limit to your impulse buying potential, given there's only so many chores in a day.
pjsr 33
YDI - everyone deserves to live in clean, tidy surroundings, and an occasional reward to self. You found a way - even if by accident - that allows you to have those things.
bannlyst 3
lol, you could freeze your card in a block of ice so when you want something you have to wait for the ice to melt and might not think it's still worth it by then
Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20
Hans, get ze Flammenwerfer!
Miss_Whipped 43
Or worse, you're like me and memorize those numbers without even trying.
RichardPencil 32
Good for you! You’ll have more room to keep your new crap!
chosha_fml 27
Sounds like you need a new system, where you go to a counsellor to figure out why you can’t stop shopping. A clean apartment is nice, but not when it’s cluttered and you’re broke.
DanielleinDC 34
Hey, that's a GOOD thing.
Wintermelons 19
Ahahahaha!!!