Today, I bought a safe. I put all of my most prized possessions in it, including all of my jewelry, family heirlooms and important papers. Oh, and just before I locked it up, I put the key to the safe in there too. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML
Today, I locked my keys in my car. I had a spare key in my wallet, that I also left in the car. FML
Today, I was fed up with things being taken from my room so I installed a key-locking handle on my door. I installed everything but the door knobs, and because I was worried that I would put the two of them on backwards, I closed the door to check. I'm now locked in my room. FML
Today, after months of wondering what a mysterious key I found in an old kitchen drawer unlocked, I finally discovered it fit the lock on a storage unit. I opened it and found a box containing three other keys I had also forgotten about. FML
Today, I spent the entire day packing my car full of boxes for my move tomorrow. When I finally finished, I realized I didn't have the car key. It's inside one of the boxes. FML
Today, my daughter used her spare key to get into my house while I was at work, then took and pawned off all of my jewelry. She only confessed when I confronted her with video camera footage. Her defense was that I told her I'd leave her everything in my will. Honey, I'm not dead yet. FML
Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML
Today, I locked my keys in my car. Good thing I went to Lowe's to make spares, which are also now locked in the car. FML
Today, I took a picture of the combination to my new lock so I would always have it on my phone if I ever forgot it. I put my phone in my gym locker, locked it with the new lock, then promptly forgot the combination. FML
Today, I lost my keys. My roommate locked me out, then yelled at me when I made her come home to let me in. I tore my room apart searching for them, and even went out to search my locker room. When I got home, I glanced at my wall only to find my keys hanging on the hook I set up specifically for them. FML
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Top comments
PaperShreds 0
Don't you need the key to lock it? If not, shouldn't you at least have a spare? At least now you can use it like those old fashioned piggy banks. Smash it! But in your case, you may need to use a diamond saw.
Lkdude77 0
Dumbass!!
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Comments (111)
PaperShreds 0
Don't you need the key to lock it? If not, shouldn't you at least have a spare? At least now you can use it like those old fashioned piggy banks. Smash it! But in your case, you may need to use a diamond saw.
Rakayum 0
i think you left your brain in there too. or check the kitchen.
suaveneanderthal 0
hey, no one and i mean no one is gonna steal anything out of your safe now!
chipmunk95 0
uhh use the keypad or master lock? go get the spare?
raNDMGUy 5
wtf, i didnt even know safes these days HAD keys
ISellHerbs 0
Did anyone consider by "key" he meant maybe a paper with the directions/combination? Other than that I'm calling shenanigans on this one.
Gahhreg 0
yeah i was expecting him to say something like "and today when i came home, i found out that somebody stole my safe" not "and i locked the key in there" im calling fake
godsrightnutsack 0
this is why you save things. duh.
spiderman0606 0
Some safes lock on closure.
its_obl 0
Seriously,aren't they all combination safes?
wooters 1
just break itopen somehow or go to the companies and ask them for a spare key..
Lkdude77 0
Dumbass!!
ParaplegicPony 0
How can you even lock a safe that uses a key without using the key itself to lock it. Think about it.
Ajjas013 6
Run it over with your car.
wiiareonfire 0
you think about it. some safes, like ones in nice hotels for example, will lock immediatly when closed.
TheiMightyKhaL 2
As Red Foreman would say.
Person1233 13
I can imagine myself doing that :/ wow that really sucks
iamstupid1243 0
break it open duuuuh foo
Sun_Kissed18 25
I'm pretty sure they are designed so you can't just easily break it open with common tools. If so then fail safe...
aellos 0
How the heck did you lock it without a key? Any way I'm imagining would've been easy to break into, so the design wouldn't work. :S Either way, take into someplace to get it open. I'd bring proof that it's yours and the stuff inside were yours.
ImJustJoking 0
YOU DESERVED IT USEING PAPERS BECAUSE IF YOU USE PAPERS THATS KILLING TREES!!!
pwnrzero 0
#7: ultimate troll win. (most stupid thing i've heard all day) nuff said. to the op, just go hire some professional to open you're case. i mean, obviously since you have a computer, and you're on fml.com, you should be proficient in the art of google.com =D
InfinityCross 1
#7, you must be horrified by the fact that basically everyone in the whole world uses paper. What now?
xoconnie 8
hahahaha ohhh daaamnnn
martinezcory 0
smooth
perdix 31
You're almost as retarded as I am!
oliviaDF 0
How'd you lock it if the key was in there?