Today, I ate at a friend's house. Her 5-year-old son, who was at the table with us, looked at me and said quietly, "You're ugly." My friend told him off, causing him to cry, and shout, "But she isn't pretty!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was hanging out at a friend's house. Her adorable 5 year-old sister came up, gave me a hug, and said, "You're fat. When are you going home?" FML
Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year-old son answered the door and when he saw me said, "Oh great, it's YOU!" and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, I met my coworker's kids during a cookout. I joked to her eldest son that he was awfully short for a seventeen-year-old. He responded, "Well, you're awfully ugly for the town slut." Everyone laughed, including my boss. FML
Today, at work, a little boy shyly told his mom he thought I was cute. I smiled at him as she looked me up and down and said to him, "Eww, honey. No, you do not!" FML
Today, I was at a restaurant when I heard a young girl telling her father she didn't think she was pretty. When I got up to leave, I walked past her table and told her she was beautiful. Her dad then punched me in the face. FML
Today, we had a group of friends over, as well as my grandma. She started talking about me when I was a kid, when I suddenly heard her saying, "Well, yeah, she wasn’t a beautiful child, not at all, she looked.… OK." FML
Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML
Today, I kissed my husband and said, "I love you." That's when our 5 year-old son said to my husband, "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML
Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML
Today, my wife told my 7-year-old son that he looks just like me. He began crying and said, "I don't want to be ugly like him." FML
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Top comments
wafflemonger 0
Just tell him Santa isn't real. That'll shut him up.
DamnGoodTimes 0
Shoulda thrown your plate across the room, broke the chair over your head, and yelled at him, "WHO THE **** ISN'T PRETTY?!??!!"
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Comments (96)
fuck_this_shit_5 0
lol "well she isnt pretty" that is too funny lol.
applessuckdick 0
Tell him that Hitler killed Santa and that monsters are under his bed.
karacutiekd 0
@49 hahahhahahaha
ifailatlife2 0
its okay when i was 5 i hated my now bestfriend because she didnt have any hair. 5 year olds are very judgemental.
deardeer 0
she didn't tell on him. OP states that the friend, herself, & the son were all at the table together. so the mom was there when it happened. no tattle-tailing involved. jeez. anyways, OP, sorry! kids can be so mean.
thecoolestever1 0
I was thinking the same thing when I saw everyone's post! I was like, "where the hell does everyone get the idea that she old on him?". Damn these people are stupid.
datkid117 13
Why'd they change the story? I swear it went "I told his mom" or something like that. =/
applessuckdick 0
Tell him that his mom got him from a dumpster.
Raquelbby 0
LMFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAO :')
MakkaCha 0
I would have done so much to the kid OMG. But i'd probably go to jail :(
bris_lions11 0
awww that's gotta hurt kill the child
ButterbeanHUN 2
Sorry OP kids never lie FYL