Today, I am struggling with exhaustion due to insomnia. The reason I cannot sleep is crippling anxiety - not about my complicated romantic situation, my pileup of work, or even my relationship with my father. No, I'm afraid of a blind ship captain I saw in a dream three days ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to the hospital for constant dizziness and insomnia, and was diagnosed with anxiety. I figured out that the main source of my anxiety is not my job but my boyfriend, who has avoidant personality, which makes him constantly refuse almost everything that I request. He's a guy who just doesn't know how to show his love. FML
Today, I had to accept that my anxiety affects me 24/7, even when while I'm sleeping. I genuinely can't remember the last time I had a pleasant dream after falling asleep. FML
Today, my anxiety decided to play a new trick: When I'm trying to go to sleep, I get anxious about having nightmares. It sure does wonders for my insomnia, which I've otherwise completely controlled. FML
Today, just like every other night, I can't sleep. even after taking prescription sleep medication, all because my anxiety won't let me sleep. Why do I have anxiety? Because I don't sleep. FML
Today, I was finally diagnosed with insomnia. The trouble is, because of my physical disability, I also have diagnosed chronic fatigue. Barely can stay awake during the day, can't sleep at night. FML
Today, after I'd finally decided to see a doctor about my anxiety and insomnia, I was so nervous about what the doctor would think of me that I had anxiety attacks that kept me from sleeping a wink all night. I ended up oversleeping and missing the appointment I was so nervous about. FML
Today, I'm officially at the point where I would do literally anything to have a pleasant dream, or at least one that's not absolutely fucking terrifying. I now know where the irrational fear of sleeping comes from. Anxiety can go fuck a duck. FML
Today, I've known for a long time that I generally only wake up at ungodly hours in the night when something is wrong with me. Since last week, I've been doing this pretty much every night. Only now, I can't figure out what's wrong. Consequently, my anxiety is now keeping me awake too. FML
Today, I had a dream about sleeping, which is a dream I have frequently. I’m exhausted even when I sleep. FML
Today, after my girlfriend had a nightmare this morning, I stayed home because she has really bad anxiety issues. A couple of hours later, she's pissed because I said I would stay up, but I fell asleep. FML
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Top comments
DarksideDoll 31
I didn't see that one coming..
godspeedkills 8
But if you think about it, the blind ship captain you see in your dreams could be an archetype of the anxiety you're not facing in your daily life. Now that's deep!
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Comments (68)
DarksideDoll 31
I didn't see that one coming..
Enderkate4 20
*ba dum tss*
15Erik 21
Neither did the Titanic
CoGhostRider 31
@31 too soon
chanelleyy 26
#38 too soon? it was 100 years ago.
Allison_leah23 17
That's the joke
Riften_Guard 14
It's ok op, all of us have our crazy fears
pwnman 33
OP, you really need to sea that it as just a dream! It wasn't reality! Seal the horror away from your mind.
LovelessAlex 18
I sea your problem...at least the captain can't.
Peacelove0404 26
We all have our own worries and fears, OP. I hope that you'll be able to relax and get some sleep soon!
cheeeksss 29
As someone who suffers from insomnia, I know that it's pretty hard to just relax. Even in bed with lights off... the mind continues to wander and it's hard to shut it off. What sometimes works for me is having the tv on in the background as I try to fall asleep. The noise distracts me from thoughts that keep me up. See what works for you, OP.
godspeedkills 8
But if you think about it, the blind ship captain you see in your dreams could be an archetype of the anxiety you're not facing in your daily life. Now that's deep!
rocker_chick105 31
That's exactly what I thought. Like the blind captain could symbolize the fact that OP doesn't know where to go with the stress in their life. Perhaps OP should sit down and try to find baby steps towards combating the stress they have.
chinaski7628 32
Or OP is the ship captain and she feels like she's on a course where she can't see what's ahead. She could be anxious because she feels like she doesn't have any direction.
TheBookWyrm 18
Interesting! I've always been into psychology.
kellyem2 20
Captains usually represent concerns about your control over things and blindness in dreams can represent a worry that opportunities are passing you by so this is actually really spot on.
godspeedkills 8
I think we just un-****** your life, OP!
iamflintpro 15
You should go to a doctor... Hopefully it goes away
thevelociraptor 31
Dreams are just images from your subconscious, so a doctor won't be much help. Maybe see a dream therapist OP, that might help sort out some of your inner thoughts.
chinaski7628 32
Although a doctor could prescribe some sleeping pills or anti-anxiety meds to help her sleep. It's not a permanent fix, but a good night's sleep after a bout of insomnia might be worth it.
RobinGoodfellow 47
Man. That's intense. Good news is, unless you live on a boat you're probably safe from the cap'n.
Mortoli 30
I dunno he's blind if live near sea he/she screwed. Lol
watermelon15 35
Don't worry, he's not gunna get you. Take a deep breath, relax and try to get catch some ZZZs. You can't deal with anything if you're sleep deprived. Turn to some sleep pills if you need.
GunSlinger69 19
I have some ridiculous things that keep me awake at night too, OP, you're not alone! Good luck, there are such thing as sleeping pills if you really need them! (: