Today, at work, I decided to make things more interesting, so when I called people I used a fake accent. As I was using an Australian accent, the person I was talking to asked me where in Australia I was from. I desperately replied, "Where the kangaroos are..." I'm now jobless. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while working alone, I decided to just try some random impressions, and so I ended up doing a French accent when a customer walked in. To avoid embarrassment, I had to continue faking the accent as he struck up a long conversation with me. FML
Today, I missed multiple calls from the company I applied to. That was the supervisor calling, wanting to hire me. I then remembered my idiotic voicemail I made months ago where I pretended to answer and say stupid stuff for 5 minutes. I don't think I'm going to get the job. FML
Today, while on my break at work, my workmates convinced me to perform my "Indian accent" piece. Everyone laughed while I was doing it. Everyone, that is, but my Indian boss. FML
Today, after returning to the UK from my Australian holiday, I was fired from my job for no reason. My boss told me he'd waited till I'd returned to do it. I could have stayed in Australia with my mates traveling for a year if I had been fired before I left. I'm sure he did it on purpose. FML
Today, the company offering the job position that I've been applying for called me up. I wasn't there to answer so they got redirected to my voice mail in which I'm acting like a drunk David Hasselhoff chewing on a cheeseburger. They called me 5 times. FML
Today, I handed my resume in to a cafe that was hiring. I returned home and noticed a voicemail, it was one from the boss for a trial. I eagerly returned the call, showing my enthusiasm. Without thinking, I ended with "ok love you. *GASP* ah, BYE" and quickly hung up. FML
Today, I got called for a job interview. I didn't catch where it was, and in my excitement I forgot to ask. I now have no idea where I'm being interviewed. FML
Today, I was volunteering at a zoo event for special needs kids. My job was to dress up in a kangaroo costume and greet the kids. One kid came up and said, "You're not real!" and kicked me in the nuts. FML
Today, my mom thought it would be a good idea for me to talk with a British accent during my job interview to make me sound smarter. I'm applying for a job at McDonald's. FML
Today, after being unemployed for over four months, I got a call from a company I've wanted to work for for over 2 years. After they were about to set up an interview, they called me by a different name. After correcting them, they hung up on me. Turns out they had the wrong number. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
theslimshadylp 6
Oh yah because there's only kangaroos in one place in Australia
CinnamonRugby 5
Crickey mate, a wild, jobless telemarketah, watch as it attempts to wallow in sorrow with alchohol.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (197)
lylee001 6
Everyone should know Sydney and Ydi for mocking us Aussies
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Oi! Oi! Oi! :D
RocketNinjaFish 12
I don't think OP was mocking us, it was probably just for fun. That said, he was being stupid and does deserve it.
AerBear115 15
Here's a few ideas: Melbourne, Sydney xD
cookies61889 15
Camaros are awesome.
krewer21 1
What a DF (dumb ****)
Dixbfloppin 11
You could have just erased the "DF" and the parentheses and left the "dumbfuck" there by itself...
MrsDepp 12
It's sad to see people are so uneducated and ignorant and can't even name one capital city in Australia...and the only thing they know is that we have kangaroos...YDI
Luunatic 13
I wouldn't even thought of saying that.
pmr1990 12
I take great offense to this FML, you totally deserved it. Culturally insensitive! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to ride my kangaroo to my koala sanctuary where I will be wrestling a crocodile and consuming spider poison for fun. G'day and goodbye mate.
glittercookies 12
Honestly, that's more of an epic stereotype than the "fat dumb American" kind.
AndreaJade 1
You forgot to mention snakes.
VioletRaven1 8
Hey Mate that's what I'm doing But Gotta Feed My Snakes First
jess183xp 1
I'm an Aussie and I reckon other Aussies are with me when I say "NEVER SPEAK WITH OUR ACCENT AGAIN!" and I'm pretty sure you didn't even use the real Aussie accent, you probs just spoke like a bogan
FeMaLes 4
******* oath! I have yet to hear a convincing Australian accent by a non-Australian. I am curious to know what he sounded like. I guess It was a stereotype Croc Dundee accent due to the kangaroo reference.
RocketNinjaFish 12
I don't think it's that bad when they speak with the accent. It actually makes me laugh because of how silly it sounds. I've never heard any Australian speak with an "Australian" accent.
species4872 20
just needed any city with correct accent viz sid nee bris bin mel bin can bra you yanks should learn whats outside of the u.s. there's a whole world out there, you know!
t765234 10
Don't group all of us in with the idiots, we hate them just as much as you do.
trollolol95 4
Not all of us are ignorant like this moron. Some of us "yanks" actually know what's outside of the U.S.
ak_6694 16
Haha strewth mate, only bloody Yanks would be that much of a drongo yammering on the wire. Fair dinkum for what ya got, now ya gotta shoot through to another job or you'll be selling your crown jewels for a few bob! That is how to speak Australian English
bingababe 16
No it's not.
AndreaJade 1
You couldn't be more wrong if you tried.
Kasse 4
Ok so I'm Australian and I have no idea what #59 is talking about. If that's Australian English I must have not reached competency yet.
purplemnm 9
He said, " Haha, very smooth, good fellow. Only the cursed Americans would be that much of an idiot to speak so stupidly over the phone. You deserved it, now you have to hurry up and find another job or you'll be selling your testicles for money."
Ameel_fml 19
Hi Alf Stewart :D
VioletRaven1 8
Really that's how we speak is it jeez I'm damn Aussie and I was wondering the hell was this it's either I forgot to learn more of my Aussie from books or u just a stupid guy who thinks that's how we speak
mrnuleef 7
Previous call: "'ello there sir! 'ow ya doin? Would you like some tea and crumpets with you services?" Call before that: " top o' the afternoon, lass! Spot o rum with ya order?" Guess third time was a charm. And note: Instead of coming up with accents, why not google something educational. Doodle or scribble or something, but dont be a jackass. You jackass.