Today, at work, a 3-year-old threw an egg at me from his cart. I couldn't leave my register to clean my hair because it was too busy, so when the new manager came in, he wrote me up for "unkempt appearance." Now my new hire probation period is extended 30 days, and my nickname is "Egghead." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, while at work at my grocery store I sold a TON of eggs to a bunch of kids. We joked around that they were "going to bake a giant cake." When I got home I found out someone had egged my house. FML
Today, at my first day working at Walmart, a customer asked if we have any egg cookers. I said I wasn't sure, but that I'd be "eggstatic" to go ask for him. The first clue I got to suggest he hated puns was him yelling "Don't get smart with me, boy!" and then threatening to kill me. FML
Social skills
Today, a really pretty girl came into my work, but when I went up to help her, my brain misfired and I accidentally said, "How can I hump you?" She yelled at me, and my manager put me on probation. FML
Today, I'm a cashier in a grocery store. The visiting regional manager tore me a new one for being lazy. His reason? After working a double shift with no break, I decided to sit down for a minute when things got slow. FML
Today, I work at a food joint as a chef, and a customer found a long strand of hair in her food. The manager blamed me, even though I'm bald. FML
Today, a customer at work said his table was dirty. I asked which one he was sitting at so I could clean it for him. For some bizarre reason he got pissed and called my manager over. He ended up reporting us to corporate, and my manager got written up. He's blaming me for everything. FML
Today, I slipped on a crayon a little girl threw on the floor, causing me to drop the tray of water I was carrying, making me spill it all over her. After getting cussed out by her mom, I was fired for making a customer unhappy. FML
Today, a customer came in to the Pizza store where I work and complained that the food they had purchased had a strand of black hair in it. After some deliberation, my boss decided to fire me. He is the only staff member there with black hair. I shaved my hair 2 weeks ago. FML
Today, my mother threw an egg at my face with force because I returned home 5 minutes late to dinner. FML
Fried
Today, I was fired from my job because I would "scare" the customers. Two days ago, a coworker spilled fry oil onto the grill, causing flames to singe my eyebrows and the front of my hair off. FML
Top comments
Ajwc95 23
That's unfair they can't treat employees like that. Call the store owner if that doesn't work try searching for another job just make sure you keep this one until you do. Good luck OP.
sNOOBie_fml 24
I hope the kid's parent told the kid it was a rude thing to do and apologized to you. There's a reason I don't really like kids, mostly because their parents don't really teach them respect and what's right and wrong.
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Comments (65)
RobinGoodfellow 47
Ahh, the limitless joys of working in retail.
Morning_fml 22
Your manager is clearly an asshole who was probably looking for an excuse to make you miserable. I hope you maturely argued back, given the circumstance. If I were treated like that by my manager, s/he can be sure as hell I'm not going down without a fight.
anthonyksee 11
Well you can call that silly manager amateur!
ndaguanno 17
I'd have a sit down with that manager then, you have a right to defend yourself.
JKPwnage 27
Did you tell them that?
thes7274473 19
That sucks but you deserved it if you didn't tell him/her "A kid threw an egg at me and I couldn't go clean myself up because it was busy." You also deserved it if you didn't do anything about the kid throwing an egg at you. You need to stand up for yourself.
fabcade 14
that sucks. you should be able to fight that
Pixelatedpotato 28
At least the parents didn't yell at you because it was somehow your fault they lost an egg.