Today, as I was walking home, a friend passed me by on his moped, and sprayed a bunch of silly string at me. Unfortunately, he hit me in the eye, temporarily blinding me. As I stumbled around blind, I accidentally knocked a bunch of 3 year olds off their bikes, causing them to cry. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while coming home from school on my bike, I lost control of it, and went straight into a light pole. Thankfully I was at a very low speed. After that, someone splashed puddle of water at me with their car. After getting to home, I went to take a bath during which the shampoo went into my left eye. It's still hurting. FML
Today, I was riding my bike back to my house. Suddenly I was hit by something in the head. I looked down to see a lemon on the ground and looked up to see a guy yelling at me in a car that was passing. He was yelling at me because I got in the way of the house he was throwing it at. FML
Today, I was at the park with my friends. We were all having fun on the swings, when out of nowhere I heard a thud, followed by a child crying. Turns out I accidentally kicked him in the head. FML
Today, a guy lost control of his umbrella in the wind, which then hit me in the eye, making me bleed. He screamed at me for trying to steal his umbrella. People laughed. FML
Today, to protect me from the 'bad people' out there, my mom bought some pepper spray. While trying to test it, I accidentally sprayed myself in the eyes. Now, every person I meet asks me what I've been crying about. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when I saw a guy in front of me trip and fall forwards, and I quickly jumped forward to steady him. Apparently he thought he was being mugged, and threw his head backwards into my face, leaving my nose a bloody mess. FML
Today, my son accidentally damaged another kid in the face with a baseball bat, while blindfolded trying to hit a piñata. Except there was no piñata, or blindfold. FML
Today, I felt something hit my eye as I was riding on my bike. My glasses ended up falling off. I looked for them for ten minutes before giving up. I ran over them. FML
Today, I surprised my friend at their birthday party with a confetti cannon. I pulled the string, expecting colorful joy. Instead, it misfired, launched backwards and smacked me in the forehead. The confetti came out five seconds later, directly onto my dazed head. FML
Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML
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Top comments
LemonadePink 0
3 year olds cry about anything, unless they got really hurt...not really an FML. Just funny. haha
Veritas143 0
Darn biker gangs always attacking the disabled fyl :p
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Comments (58)
aback 5
I think I'd have paid money to see that.
Sun_Kissed18 25
He made a bunch of 3 year olds cry :(
marquisrs 0
pwned bitch ass 3 year olds
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
I think the OP knocked those 3-year-olds on purpose and the silly string missed you. Did you at least say, "I'll give you something to cry about!", punch each of them in the face, and steal their bikes? Am I the only one who thinks the OP didn't do enough here?
aback 5
No, I think you've got the right idea.
Shmeaty 0
who cares?
Chowi_fml 0
There are nine million bicycles in Beijing. Or so I'm told.
klesskapet 0
**** their lives, you child molester D:
Troll_patrol 0
HA HA you suck you ******* loser.
Morphs 0
Why stroll around like a zombie when you got something in your eye? Stand still and fix it, then continue walking... YDI.
mike1921 0
Awesome, how is this an FML. I envy you man.