Today, after being in the hospital for two days with no visitors, I got my first phone call. It was my best friend asking if he could date my ex-girlfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I called one of my old coworkers to see how she was doing. My boyfriend answered the phone. FML
Today, I had a rare phone call from my ex-girlfriend. We ended up talking for hours about old times. It was the best conversation we have had in forever, it made me miss her and miss us. Later on in the day, she called back asking what we talked about. She was too high too remember. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend asked how long he'd have to wait until he could ask out my best friend. We broke up yesterday. FML
Today, I was chilling with my best friend and suddenly I got a text from my ex saying he wanted me back. My best friend saw the text and said, "Don't go back with him, you deserve better." I wanted to go back with him but I didn't. Later, I saw them hanging out and turns out they're dating. FML
Today, my ex called me up to suggest that we become friends, only so that she could introduce me to her new boyfriend. FML
Today, I found out that the reason my ex-fiance didn't visit me in the hospital after my accident, which I dumped him for, was because the hospital wouldn't let him in because he wasn't family. He's blocked my number, returned the ring and everything. FML
Today, my mom called me to tell me she'd got in touch with my ex for his birthday, and that the two of them had made a plan for us to get back together. My new boyfriend was in the process of proposing to me. FML
Today, I was talking to my best friend about how much of an asshole my ex-boyfriend is. After about 2 hours of non-stop bitching, it turns out she's actually dating him. FML
Today, my husband came home from the hospital after having painful surgery, so I decided to make him a nice big breakfast. As I was taking it up to him, I heard a message on the phone. It was from one of his nurses. She was accepting his offer of a date. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I got just three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office, to sing me a happy birthday. FML
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Top comments
Rayn4u_fml 0
At least he cared about your friendship enough to ask you, rather than going for it and you finding out in the worst possible way. Unfortunately he's put you in that awful position where you just have to say yes because otherwise you're the guy who "didn't want his friend to find happiness". Good luck!
marny_fml 0
omg, what an asshole.
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Comments (27)
marny_fml 0
omg, what an asshole.
mleugim 0
yep, forget about that, and move on
sniperpie 0
YES! Haha! I agree with #11.
Rayn4u_fml 0
At least he cared about your friendship enough to ask you, rather than going for it and you finding out in the worst possible way. Unfortunately he's put you in that awful position where you just have to say yes because otherwise you're the guy who "didn't want his friend to find happiness". Good luck!
skeptictank 0
I hope you told him off and deleted his number from your phone.
amadeclton 27
Little bit of an overreaction...
SelfawareAimBot 0
hahah, i have one like that but it happened ages ago so i cant post it, i almost choked to death once, i went to the hospital because some of it got lodged in my throat so i could breath but i was unable to eat or drink, and after a day and a half of no food or water except by IV i get released, i go to school to see my girlfriend and she yells at me for leaving her hanging on AIM. so i know how it goes
jansdrs 19
I remember the days of AIM. Good times.
DarkNightmares 0
I would Be like, Some best friend you are! Damn in the hosptial and you wanna know if you can date my ex!...**** OFF. -lol-
wbombers92 0
It's your fault for not having any good friends. DUMP THEM ALL
fish_drown 0
God, what a douchebag.
kayykatastrophii 0
I agree with #2. Anyways, that's horrible. You need a new best friend. And I hope you're feeling better for whatever you were in the hospital for.