Today, after a number of other automotive misadventures, I tried to find out why my radiator fan decided to quit working. That's when my hood struts thought it would be a good time to give way. Now I have big bruise on my shoulder where the latch hit me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
My old buddy
Today, I climbed into my junky old car and was pleasantly surprised that the AC came on. I patted the dash and said, "Thanks, buddy." Ten minutes later, as I was tearing down the highway, the engine threw a rod. FML
Today, the air bag system in my car somehow malfunctioned, and the air bag inflated while I was driving, causing me to lose control and crash into a street light. I ended up with a badly bruised face because the air bag had already deflated by then. FML
Today, I got an alarm installed in my car, and was having problems with it not going off when the car was hit. To demonstrate this to the installers, I bumped my car with my hip, which left a dent, and set the alarm off. FML
How? What?
Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML
Drama kings and queens unite!
Today, I was doing some routine maintenance on my car when a radiator connector broke unexpectedly. I realized I'd rather walk 3 miles in freezing temperatures than call my nearest friends for a ride and have to listen to their drama. FML
Roadworthy
Today, after an argument with my girlfriend, I tried to be dramatic by slamming my car door shut as hard as I could. Something broke and now it won't open. Now I have to climb through the passenger's side just to drive my car to work. FML
It's all too much
Today, at 4:30 a.m., I hit a deer on the freeway on my way to work. I've only had this car for 6 months and it's totaled. I had to wait hours for a tow. On his way to pick me up, my husband's radiator blew and his serpentine belt shredded. I also missed a day of work. FML
Ouch
Today, accustomed to dealing with my old car's faulty accelerator, I pressed the pedal way too hard in my new car and crashed into a pillar, totaling the engine, and giving myself a concussion. I could still see the dealership down the street. FML
Show off
Today, I got lunch with a girl I really like. On the way, for some idiotic reason I decided it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the red hand on a traffic sign. I ended up slipping and slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on my face. FML
Old deathtrap
Today, I couldn't get my car hood to open to check the fluids. A few miles down the highway, though, it popped right open. FML
Top comments
jbuckets_404 39
BloopaLoop, you apparently don't know the difference between "anthropomorphize," "cultural appropriation," and "racist." Suggest you consult a dictionary to learn the differences. Or are you simply being a troll? :-( However, if you were temping to employ sarcasm, you forgot the "/s" tag. Then again, jokes about racism usually aren't very humorous nor is this ambiguous one (racist or otherwise) told well nonetheless.
RichardPencil 32
Don’t anthropomorphize hood struts. They hate that.
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
Don’t anthropomorphize hood struts. They hate that.
bloopaloop 27
Yeah. That’s cultural appropriation. You racist. Do your research.
jbuckets_404 39
BloopaLoop, you apparently don't know the difference between "anthropomorphize," "cultural appropriation," and "racist." Suggest you consult a dictionary to learn the differences. Or are you simply being a troll? :-( However, if you were temping to employ sarcasm, you forgot the "/s" tag. Then again, jokes about racism usually aren't very humorous nor is this ambiguous one (racist or otherwise) told well nonetheless.