Today, after 2 weeks of hard work in the heat planting a garden, just as I thought the most stressful part was over, my wife's mother comes over and brings a huge dog. She then threw a tennis ball for the dog into my freshly seeded garden multiple times, completely destroying most of it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML
Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weed-whacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgot that I was mowing where the dogs take dumps, I absentmindedly whacked over dog poop… which got flung into my face. FML
Today, I hate my wife’s dog. It destroys everything in the house, it destroys my garden, she barks constantly in her bed, and when I walk her she tries to attack every living thing she sees, but the instant I talk to my wife about her behaviour, I get yelled at for being mean. FML
Today, I had to water my entire garden. After an exhausting hour of watering hundreds of plants, I turned off the hose and started to feel good about the grueling job. That is, until it started pouring rain. FML
Today, I was woken up by my wife calling the police because our garden had been ransacked during the night. A whole row of houses has had their plants uprooted, greenhouses broken into and garden tools stolen. The cops haven't found any leads and I feel terrible for my wife, who poured her heart and soul into that garden. FML
Today, I got super psyched up about a landscaping project my wife denied last year that she's finally game for, which will both fix a water leak into the house, and make our backyard look amazing. I took a week of PTO, then 20 minutes later my wife called to tell me a tree in our back yard fell over. We're also probably getting divorced. FML
Today, three weeks after I finally tried my hand at gardening by planting a bunch of herbs and was so proud of my work, I found out that I had actually been watering weeds this whole time. My herbs were actually the things I was trying to eliminate. FML
Today, I wanted revenge on my neighbor, whose dog craps in my yard, so I spent a day at the dog park gathering up dog shit. I piled it up by the property line and ran over it with the mower, intending to spray his driveway and car with turds. Instead, it gummed up the mower. Now it stinks too bad to fix. FML
Today, I finished building a porch I've worked hard on for the past 2 weeks, and I was very proud on how amazing it turned out. Within 20 minutes of it being completed, my pregnant dog decided to crawl underneath it to have her puppies. I had to take half the porch apart to get to her and them. FML
Today, I bent down to pick up my dog’s mangled tennis ball at the park. At the exact same moment, someone’s Great Dane ran full speed into me from behind, knocking me face-first into the mud. My dog then ran off with another family. FML
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Top comments
marcus903 17
Kick her out since she has no respect for others people.
MegaExplosives 17
make her replant everything
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Comments (60)
straymondar 10
Take a shovel and smack the old bitch
trucker2 33
Toss her keys to her- tell her she's over stayed her welcome.
nightstalker94 18
Or be a man and not tend to a garden and instead drink beer and eat bacon.
revolvearoundme 15
FYL. With a touch of YDI. I'm guessing you forgot the most important part of a garden. Signs that let people know you will light them on fire and roast your vegetables on their corpses. Best thing to do would probably let them sprout, maybe grow till you know what is what and transplant them back where they belong. After putting up violent signs.
mackdeezy 22
I love how you said "my wife's mother" Theres definitely dome history here.
thisguy22 33
Decomposing corpses make good fertilizer... Just sayin'...
SoBeSatan 22
Wow. What complete disregard for your property. Sad part is, it wasn't the dogs fault.
zeffra13 31
Wait, freshly seeded? Not planted? Water after & it should be fine. They might not grow exactly where you wanted but can move the sprouts around. I'm guessing your MIL didn't realize it was anything but a dirt patch.
mlustpdx 17
kill the broad
naviajack626 16
Well why didn't you stop her?