Today, a 65 year old toothless gas station attendant asked me out on a date in exchange for free gas, and I said yes. This is what my unemployment has come to. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my car ran out of gas. I was 20 feet away from the gas pump and the only person I could ask for help was the attendant, who'd asked me out a week ago. I'd said no, and so did he. FML
Today, as I was fueling my truck, I was asked out to dinner by a 65-year-old retiree. I'm 25. He stormed off and called me a bitch for politely turning him down. FML
Today, I watched a grizzled old gas station attendant, with a stain on her blouse, use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML
Today, I received a marriage proposal at work from a 70 year-old man, covered in dirt from head to toe, who offered to be my "sugar daddy." I guess I have options after all. FML
Today, I agreed to go on a date with the creepy guy from my Economics class because I'm so broke that I could really use the free meal. FML
Today, I worked up the courage to ask my crush out for coffee after work. She agreed and I confidently said, "Alright, it's a date!" She replied, "Haha, a date with you? I'm just going for the free coffee!" FML
Today, I was out with my youngest cousin and we had to stop for gas. Since he just got his license, I asked if he wanted to pump the gas while I went into the station to get snacks and pay. He pumped my car full of diesel. FML
Today, I submitted my application to a restaurant as a server. The manager, who is more than 30 years older than me, said he'd be calling me. He later texted me asking for a date instead of giving me a job. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to ask out the guy I've liked for a long time. He's a cashier at a grocery store. It was about 1am and I was his last customer, everything seemed just right. Just when I was about to ask him to the movies, a drunk girl stumbles in and asks him out. He said yes. FML
Today, I got a date after being alone for the past 2 years. The girl who my friends set me up with began asking my monthly income, my current occupation, and asked if I have a credit card account. FML
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Top comments
imustbeinsane 2
Ditch him he cant take back the gas
muhaidib 2
Ahh, that's how hookers start
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Comments (143)
xHuey123 0
Well i'd do it. Who's not into old men right?
mbrown27 1
awww poor thing, you need a hug.
hateevryone 15
as soon as he give you the free gas, ditch him. he can't take it back.
Zeronos 0
This makes me wonder... What would you do for a Klondike bar? heh heh. ;)
KiddNYC1O 22
I hope you have turbo; burst the **** out of there... far.
DeafWolverine 8
ill take ya out lol
kareltje 17
Selfrespect, sold for 4 bucks per liter... That's a good one...
duhWINNING2_fml 9
Ewwwwwe
Takainthemachine 0
If you go, please update us on how long he took to chew his food! Lmao or perhaps he does puree?
naakaa319 4
Make sure you don't go out alone with him!