Today, when a discussion with my roommate veered into politics, he made it clear he thinks I'm an instrument of his oppression because I'm not a communist. I pay rent and utilities, and buy groceries. He and his wife take up most of the space in the apartment and I keep the secret that she never stopped cheating. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was meeting with my landlord to discuss buying the house I currently rent. It was going great, and he was going to give us an amazing deal. Until my idiot "socialist" teenage son barged in and attacked him, calling him a "bourgeoisie landowner." Now we're practically homeless and facing charges. FML
Today, my roommate woke me up during afternoon nap to tell me that I need to move out. His reason: "Our political differences will likely escalate to violence." FML
Today, yet again, despite the fact that I don't know anything about politics, I got roped into a political discussion with my roommates. FML
Today, my roommate and I were watching TV, and he ordered a pizza. After it was delivered, I took a slice. He yelled at me for taking his food and told me to stop mooching off him. I had to cover his rent last month and he still hasn't paid me back. FML
Today, my new roommate with I've been living for 30 days told me that we needed to consolidate our funds. When I said no, they called me a racist Karen. I don’t have a choice of roommate, due to being in a program. I'm the only one working and this person has no desire to work. FML
Today, my husband referred to me as his “roommate” when I came home from work and saw his female coworker here for a visit. The one he has “work conversations” with at 11 pm. I've talked to him about it and he tells me I’m being paranoid and unreasonable. FML
Today, I found out that my roommate is starting a religion in which he doesn't believe in humanly things, such as paying rent. FML
Today, I learned that because I clean everything in my roommate's house and keep the lights low to save energy, and respect him and do things in the proper way I was raised, he and his friends and girlfriend think I’m weird and won’t speak to me. FML
Today, my landlord told me he is raising my rent next month. I thought he was kidding until he asked if I still wanted to live here. My landlord is also my live-in boyfriend. FML
Today, I got a new roommate. I thought he was pretty cool until he mentioned how everything around us was a conspiracy. Then he asked if I knew how to make a bomb. FML
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Top comments
JasonThorn 23
Get out of there ASAP, and drop the bomb about her cheating before you leave for the last time. Then escape in the chaos. See how he feels about his girlfriend making her nether bits a "collective resource."
Iamthebanzai22 21
They say that debating with an intelligent person is hard but debating with an idiot is impossible.. I once tried to debate with some communists. You can't. Even when you point out to them that in a capitalist economy they have total freedom to start their 'worker run business ' yet they don't. It's easier to blame someone else for their poverty just like it is easier to blame someone else for his wife looking for love elsewhere.
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Comments (2)
Iamthebanzai22 21
They say that debating with an intelligent person is hard but debating with an idiot is impossible.. I once tried to debate with some communists. You can't. Even when you point out to them that in a capitalist economy they have total freedom to start their 'worker run business ' yet they don't. It's easier to blame someone else for their poverty just like it is easier to blame someone else for his wife looking for love elsewhere.
JasonThorn 23
Get out of there ASAP, and drop the bomb about her cheating before you leave for the last time. Then escape in the chaos. See how he feels about his girlfriend making her nether bits a "collective resource."