Three's a crowd
Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML
Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML
Today, I had to spend a long bus ride with my chest pressed against the window, because some mammoth of a woman decided to squeeze her double wide ass into my seat. FML
Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML
Today, I got on a bus that was so overcrowded I had to stand next to the driver with nothing to hang on to. A drunk man got on and for the rest of the half hour journey continuously fell on me. When I got off, he smiled and told me as the doors were closing, "The last twelve times was for fun." FML
Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML
Today, I got on a crowded bus and was forced to stand. The bus made a sharp turn, so I reached for a pole to hold onto. Without looking, I grabbed the pole. It was wet and moist, but I nonetheless held on until the turn was done. I turned to see I had also grabbed a large man's nose and had squeezed it. FML
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Today, while I was riding the bus to work, I noticed the guy sitting across from me had shorts on. He also had no underwear on and I could fully see his "parts" just hanging there. I decided to switch seats but as I stood up to move, the bus jerked. I fell face forward right into his "parts". FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from school. I was sitting by myself, and my backpack was occupying the seat next to me. A hot girl boarded the bus, and was standing right where I was sitting. I placed my backpack on my lap, freeing up the seat. The girl stood the entire bus ride. FML
Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML
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Top comments
mastodonkcid 5
longest eh?
schhichick 14
What was the longest part?
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Comments (102)
Mons_fml 27
RAPE!!!
schhichick 14
Rape is never something to joke about.
sirliam99 12
Yes it is, it's called rape jokes
Enslaved 38
Seems fitting that your location is Down Under.
lalaturd 5
That is too close for my space bubble.
ostfaiz 18
longest guy! longest ride! what else is longest ;)
tournamentdecide 33
Sure it wasn't the shortest?
Bombegranite 14
Speaking of shortest this guy must be like 4.5 if someone's dick was against his shoulder. Like, even if he was a big guy, he would have to be pretty damn tall for that to happen, as in 7 feet maybe
SweetasCandy0609 28
Well I hope it wasn't also the hardest bus ride along with it being the longest.
JCal585 8
Stand up for yourself and tell him to quit. And if he won't, elbow him in the crotch. Why take that crap?
davincidasecond 24
Nothing can be more awkward than having someone's crotch on your shoulder.
JoshTheTacoMan 19
Wait, so he took his dick out and put it on your shoulder? Or it was just the way he was standing and it didn't come out of his pants?
Tooorrriii3 22
"Big guy"? ;)