Today, I was at work and was confronted by a customer wanting to get a "Nemo" fish. I explained that 'Nemo' needs to live in saltwater, not freshwater, like their tank was. The customer then turns around and grabs a perforated tank divider and says, "Can't I just split them up with this?" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML
Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML
Today, as I was washing my boyfriend's fishbowl, the fish did a Nemo and made an unholy leap down the drain. My immediate impulse was to flip the switch. Our kitchen now smells like mutilated fish and my boyfriend won't speak to me. FML
Today, I excitedly showed my new roommate my pet fish. She then told me about how she purposely starved her last fish to see how long it would take before they started eating each other before starving to death. FML
Today, a man asked about fishing in the river that flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML
Today, my dad decided to clean my 20 gallon fish tank. I had 6 fish. One of them was called a transparent fish, clear with a bright orange tail, which was my favorite. My dad didn't see it, and dumped the water out along with it. FML
Today, I was verbally abused by a customer because her entrée was too fishy. I'm not the chef, just the waiter, and I work at a fish grill. FML
Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML
Today, I found out why you shouldn't drop instant mashed potatoes in a fish tank, especially when you have expensive fish. FML
Today, I bought a fish. I put the tank on top of the fridge so my cat wouldn't get at it. I'd forgotten to buy some things for its tank, so I quickly ran out to get them. When I got home, I saw the tank destroyed on the floor, and my cat devouring my fish. I had the fish for less than an hour. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
What's not to get? A perforated tank divider is a fish tank divider with holes in it, thus defeating the purpose of separating different kinds of water. They're used to separate fish that would usually fight each other. Since water molecules are obviously a lot smaller than fish, they would get through the holes. Personally, I wouldn't want to sell anyone an animal if they didn't know the name of it. I think there's actually something that says pet store employees can refuse selling an animal if the person wanting to make a purchase seems incompetent enough, because it would result in the death of the pet.
ZOMBlE 0
Shoulda smacked a bitch.
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Comments (238)
Stupified 0
Op, if you think it's life ******* to meet an idiot, might I suggest not using the Internet?
ohSNAPyall 27
heheh
xrawrified 0
This is more of a notalwaysright.com type of thing.
robtuffguy 0
just stfu
dogbite14 2
lol, I've been asked dumb questions like that when I work at PetSmart way back when. people are so stupid.
omgimdabest 0
oh c'mon you met an idiot and its an fml...get this through your head 1/3 peoplle are idiots, if you don't know if you are that One, take it from me...you're an idiot!
ohthebloodygore 16
43, STOP SAYING IDIOT. That's my word. Now that we've established that. You're an idiot.
FFML_314 12
I agree with Precious. You're an idiot, 43.
kaileigh10 2
I don't get it...
SavageFrenchFri 0
33 y r u making ur self look like a dumbass poser
compliments 0
well can he??
Stupified 0
is that Justin Beaver?
caliangel 0
haha that's what I was wondering!! but why would he be wearing girl panties?? lol
Rawr_Doodle 0
cuz he sings like a 15 year old chick, duhhhhh
caliangel 0
But there's no bulge!! haha!!
Oanaj 0
I woke my whole family up laughing my ass off at this pic. I enjoyed it untill I looked closer at the face being Justin Bieber.
johnnie99 0
There's no bulge because there's no penis.
Ochabox 0
this is not worthy of fml. f you.
anorexicbarbie 8
This isn't an FML, oh boohoo you encountered an idiot. I feel soo sorry for you.