Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. We decided to have sex in her basement. All awesome, until her mom walked down and wanted to watch a movie with us. I had to watch it naked under a blanket. FML
Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't in the mood. A half hour later, I caught him jerking off to several windows of porn. FML
Today, I had to explain to my fiancé that having me watch him jerk off over a porno is not in fact considered foreplay. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML
Today, I was taking advantage of an empty house to try and re-spark my sex drive. Despite my best efforts, I got bored and started watching something else, but when my housemate returned suddenly, I panicked - gave a guilty shout and fumbled my dick away as I changed the monitor over - back to porn. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, I went to my friend's house because his family was having a move away party for him. Everything was going good until his dad decided to give a toast. Including an anecdote about how he walked in on us watching porn together. FML
Today, I invited my new girlfriend over for the first time. My roommate thought it would be funny to go on a porn site on my computer and leave it up. She saw it, freaked out, slapped me, and left. FML
Today, my girlfriend made me put a blanket over my head while giving me a blowjob because she didn't like the faces I was making. FML
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Top comments
JuliaKay14 33
Why didn’t you just ****?
WistayShlaio82 13
Seems like you two need to talk more about your likes and dislikes. Kinks too.
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Comments (9)
RichardPencil 32
It is weird. If **** doesn't carry the stigma of secret shame, then what good is it? If you haven't noticed, the acting is terrible and the plots are very predictable.
Chad Fehn 3
I think you missed the whole point of the OP.
RichardPencil 32
Which is what?
Chad Fehn 3
His fiancée was doing all of this with another guy. He was just watching. Finally, she kicked her fiancée out because it was weird with him watching her getting busy with another guy.
raven_of_azarath 35
That is not at all what happened.
fjvitt 14
Sounded very hot until you got kicked out....
WistayShlaio82 13
Seems like you two need to talk more about your likes and dislikes. Kinks too.
JuliaKay14 33
Why didn’t you just ****?
distortedcognition 17
So whatcha doing right about now?