Today, my boss requested that I re-organize every file in the office, because she wanted the filing cabinets alphabetized right to left, not left to right. To thank me, she came into my office to give me one uncooked ear of corn. I think my boss has mistaken me for some kind of farm animal. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my CEO called and spoke to me like I'm a child. Apparently, she has a surprise for me, "but only if I clean up my office first." She hasn't been to my office in months because she works in another state. Turns out, someone texted her a picture of my messy office. FML
Today, my boss told me to 'think outside the box'. I did and got lost in a corn maze for hours. FML
Today, my boss asked for recommendations on how to improve the office. I sent her an e-mail full of my ideas. Later, my boss sent me a reply, saying, "Here's what head office thinks of your ideas." It contained a list of insults upper management made about me. FML
Today, my boss ate a small piece of paper off her desk, thinking it was frosting. I have to work for this woman. FML
Today, my boss became very angry over her own mistake on a spreadsheet. She lashed out by throwing a can of SpaghettiOs at my head. FML
Today, I found out I've been incorrectly sorting thousands of papers for the past two weeks. My boss wanted them sorted by date, but the co-worker who instructed me said to sort them into alphabetical order just to watch me fail. FML
Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "fried" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML
Today, during a meeting with my boss, she explained she's giving me one more chance before she has to fire me. Her reason? I accidentally ordered chicken on a salad last week for a meeting and she feels my performance has gone down the tubes. FML
Today my boss went digging through my drawer, took a pack of gum, and told me I got him the wrong flavor. He kept it anyway. FML
Today, at 1 am, I got a message from a colleague, who I have never met, bossing me around requesting "immediately, ASAP" some information a monkey could've found online in 5 minutes. I told her that she sounded rude and unorganised. Ten minutes later, I got a mail from my boss asking me to apologise to her. I did. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
Well, that's kinda corny.
vheissu 0
at least you got some corn.
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Comments (154)
inspireme48 0
wow your boss is an asshole! :o
Tubasaurus 0
Somebody call the WHHAAAAMBULANCE!
CyclonePsycho 1
Does your boss also ride you way too much, especially when it's hot outside? :o
crazyasianlady 0
Maybe tomorrow if you work extra hard she will give you a stick of butter to go with it.
ksand06 0
Move the filing cabinets that are on the t left to the right and the ones on the right to the left. Seems pretty simple. AND you get corn. Win win in my book
vvtumblesbee 0
filing cabinets are usually stacked... like A-D are all in one cabinet, but in separate compartments. if you simply move the ones on the left over to the right and vice versa, then you'll end up with something like Y-Z, U-X, Q-T, M-P, I-L, E-H, A-D. i do agree about the corn FTW though.
1OBSESSION 0
You can eat corn raw.
Entheatus 13
I don't think this is an FML. However I do find this entry hilarious.
johnts03 8
I was at Walmart earlier and they had ears of corn on sale for $0.20 apiece. 20 cents for an ear of corn! Unless she grew the corn herself she might as well have tossed you a quarter for your trouble.
TUnitDaMonster 0
hahahA
baileys82 0
your boss is awesome. i am really sorry you have to deal with that. next time moo at her to thank her.