Today, my mother once again brought up how I would have done so much better in my Track season if I just smiled while I ran. Apparently, if you just smile, your brain won't know you're in pain. I don't think it works like that, but thanks for the advice mom. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my mom I wanted to try out for the track team. Her exact words were "good luck, fatty". FML
Today, I was told how cruel and selfish I am for rubbing my weight loss in my mom’s face. I’ve literally begged my mom to walk, jog, workout with me for months. She went exactly once. She complained the whole time, then called me a bitch for finishing my run while she sat in the car. FML
Today, I told my mom that I'm bulimic and have been for a few years, and that I needed help. She responded by saying, "Well that's clearly not working for you. Why don't you try anorexia?" She then patted me on the head, smiled, and walked away. FML
Today, I was running the 100m sprint in a track meet. Me and another girl were tied for dead last. When we finished, she complained, "It's so embarrassing how slow I am today. I have shin splints. What happened to you?" I was actually running my hardest. FML
Today, I heard a little girl saying how much she didnt want braces to her mom because they hurt and make people look ugly. I looked at her and said, "Aww, there not that bad. See, I have them!" I then smiled to show her. She turned to her mom and said, "See!" then started to cry. FML
Today, I was stretching after a group run. I noticed one of the girls was having problems balancing, so I told her that I have horrible balance too, but that it'll get better. She sneered and said she had a brain tumor when she was a kid, and that's why she has such bad balance. FML
Today, I had a swollen knee, and was slowly limping to the toilet. All of a sudden, my mom ran past me, beating me to it. As she closed the door, she said, "AT LEAST I CAN RUN!" FML
Today, I overheard my mother saying that it is “physically painful” for her not to be mean to me. FML
Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML
Today, I was at another long swim-meet, when my daughter shaved 15 seconds off her record swim time. When I asked her how she did it, she replied, "Well someone told me to swim as fast as I can." She's just been taking her time all these years. FML
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Top comments
mylonius 19
I feel that strategy only works when you're on ecstasy.
Steephx0 23
Oh, I've actually heard this. One of those stupid myths. Tell her that the most successful running advice is to listen to your body and to stop when you're in pain.
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Comments (54)
ThatHorse 15
Punch her and then tell her that the pain will go away if she just smiles more. ... ... (Don't actually do that kids. It's just some dark humor to lighten OPs situation a bit)
firemuncher 19
i feel like you were brackets away from getting downvoted
Odin1624 12
Smiling won't do jack but having a strong mindset will, telling yourself that you aren't tired and you still got a lot gas
GhostFox 34
Or such a mindset would eventually cause the person to miss or ignore vital warnings from the body about a serious problem, and cause them to injure themself, possibly beyond repair.
Dale_shackleford 13
Yeah, I don't have statistics, but based on personal experience it seems like most non contact sports injuries are caused by overexertion.
Tripartita 45
Oh, THAT'S why world famous runners—and athletes in general—are known for smiling like clowns as they perform! Wait, what the actual ****?
PrimalSeptimus 2
Try dropping the hammer instead.
YourOpinionSucks 22
The funny thing is she isn't necessarily wrong. No, smiling will not let you play through the pain. But screaming does. Go ahead and look up the link between cursing/screaming and pain. Another "trick" that seems like it shouldn't work (because of how it's played up in movies (jackass)) is if you cause pain to another part of your body. It takes away from the greater pain, since your body has to focus at least a little bit on the new pain.
GhostFox 34
If you are running, you don't have the air to scream. In fact, screaming would be a great way to ruin the breathing pattern that runners try to stick to.
moondoglou420 17
No way, what you really need is just a spoonful of sugar right before the meet goes down.
BREADFAN 5
Maybe your mom just wanted to see you doing something that made you happy
alaina1104 11
I've heard that smiling tricks your brain into thinking you're happy and releasing good hormones, but as a runner, I can guarantee that nothing will eliminate the pain of running. Just got to push through it OP!
LandolphiN 3
Pain is all in our heads
Muskrat777 13
tell her to smile then punch her in the ribs, she wont feel anything