Today, I overheard my mother telling my sister that she expects my marriage to fall apart any day now. Apparently, I have no concept of what "marriage" really means. My husband and I just celebrated our 7th anniversary, while my mother is planning her 5th wedding. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I overheard my mom talking on the phone with my sister about how much they hate my fiancé. My wedding is in two weeks and my family has been pretending to like my future husband for three years. FML
Today, I had a double wedding with my sister. My mother, being as encouraging as she always is, told us that statistics say one of our marriages will end in divorce. She then explained she thinks it'll be mine because I'm "a self-absorbed bitch." FML
Today, marks the sixth day in a row that my mum has called me to discuss my upcoming wedding. She's obsessed and has intimidated the actual planner I hired into going along with her plans. She's slipped up twice already and accidentally referred to it as her own wedding. Just great. FML
Today, my mom informed me she got married two weeks ago. Hard to congratulate her when this is her eighth husband. FML
Today, I announced my engagement. My mother's response was to freak out and demand that I postpone my wedding indefinitely. Why? My younger sister caught the bouquet at a wedding last year, so "she has to get married first!" My sister has been single for 3 years and showers once a week. FML
Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML
Today, my ex-husband and the woman he left me for, also known as my sister, are getting married. On my birthday. My mom is gleefully helping plan the wedding. She seriously sees nothing wrong, and tells me to “stop being a Bitter Betty and be happy for your sister.” FML
Today, I got married and my mom refused to be there because my dad, whose guts she hates, was there even though I promised repeatedly that I would keep them apart. I couldn't do the mother-son dance. She keeps insisting that it was a "lapse in judgment." Yeah, like we're really going to be able to have a do-over. FML
Today, I planned on introducing my fiancé to my parents. After the introductions, and telling him how I hoped our relationship would have the same amount of love and commitment that has lasted my mother and father for 25 years, my parents awkwardly announced their imminent divorce. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she had fantasies about throwing him out a window when he was a baby because she was so depressed and couldn't handle the stress. The worst part is he wants to get married. She'd be my mother-in-law. FML
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Top comments
whiteboy896 9
What a hypocrite!
DarkJediLove 19
Don't mind her, she seems to think marriage is about quantity and not quality.
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Comments (120)
pastnastificatio 4
Congratulations! All it takes is love, trust, and honesty
florido_fml 10
I think your mom just likes weddings
loserman67 36
You mother is obviously right... To you marriage is a long-term meaningful commitment to your spouse, to her it's banging a guy until she gets tired of him, then finding someone else. I think you need to laugh her opinions off and keep on doing what you're doing.
pastnastificatio 4
Easy, one of those guys was OP's father
rokemay 10
Not necessarily. You don't need to be married to have kids.
mike307 11
Not long term, a life long commitment.
pastnastificatio 4
Yes, necessarily, Rokemay. True, he didn't need to be one of the spouses; but, he does need to be a sexual partner. Fertility treatments notwithstanding, of course.
rokemay 10
That's all I'm saying. Yes OP's mom slept with her father, but its possible she wasn't married to him. If she is on her 5th marriage, it's probable that she has slept around a bit as well and could have easily gotten pregnant from a fling or a guy she was casually dating
perdix 31
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
She obviously likes planning weddings, so she needs you to dump your husband, find a new guy and marry him. If you were really clever, you'd get your current husband to wear a rubber nose and glasses, and let him be the "new guy." Your mom will think you finally "get" marriage and you'll get to stay with the guy you like (with a hilarious new look!) Problem solved -- YWIA.
RedPillSucks 33
If she's so certain your marriage is about to fall apart, you might want to check with your spouse to make sure mommy isn't planing some weird sexual sabotage.
AmandaLikNoOther 6
Don't worry OP she is just jealous!
Jac_d_ipper 10
It's actually '**** Her Life' and not ur FML.
justjimmy89 5
parents.. they know best..
Homer1975 14
good point dude
EmoRockChic 11
Not all the time actually
kingsian 15
She speaks from "experience"
anitadoody 7
Don't worry, it's jealousy speaking through her.