Today, I overheard my mother telling my sister that she expects my marriage to fall apart any day now. Apparently, I have no concept of what "marriage" really means. My husband and I just celebrated our 7th anniversary, while my mother is planning her 5th wedding. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overheard my mom talking on the phone with my sister about how much they hate my fiancé. My wedding is in two weeks and my family has been pretending to like my future husband for three years. FML
Today, I had a double wedding with my sister. My mother, being as encouraging as she always is, told us that statistics say one of our marriages will end in divorce. She then explained she thinks it'll be mine because I'm "a self-absorbed bitch." FML
Today, marks the sixth day in a row that my mum has called me to discuss my upcoming wedding. She's obsessed and has intimidated the actual planner I hired into going along with her plans. She's slipped up twice already and accidentally referred to it as her own wedding. Just great. FML
Today, my mom informed me she got married two weeks ago. Hard to congratulate her when this is her eighth husband. FML
Today, I announced my engagement. My mother's response was to freak out and demand that I postpone my wedding indefinitely. Why? My younger sister caught the bouquet at a wedding last year, so "she has to get married first!" My sister has been single for 3 years and showers once a week. FML
Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML
Today, my ex-husband and the woman he left me for, also known as my sister, are getting married. On my birthday. My mom is gleefully helping plan the wedding. She seriously sees nothing wrong, and tells me to “stop being a Bitter Betty and be happy for your sister.” FML
Today, I got married and my mom refused to be there because my dad, whose guts she hates, was there even though I promised repeatedly that I would keep them apart. I couldn't do the mother-son dance. She keeps insisting that it was a "lapse in judgment." Yeah, like we're really going to be able to have a do-over. FML
Today, I planned on introducing my fiancé to my parents. After the introductions, and telling him how I hoped our relationship would have the same amount of love and commitment that has lasted my mother and father for 25 years, my parents awkwardly announced their imminent divorce. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she had fantasies about throwing him out a window when he was a baby because she was so depressed and couldn't handle the stress. The worst part is he wants to get married. She'd be my mother-in-law. FML
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Top comments
whiteboy896 9
What a hypocrite!
DarkJediLove 19
Don't mind her, she seems to think marriage is about quantity and not quality.
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Comments (120)
Vegnas 13
That is what we in the psychology field call "displacement"
DocBastard 40
The best revenge in the world is proving someone wrong. Ok, that's actually second best. The best is hiding a rotting fish in someone's car - by the time they figure it out, the odor is permanent. But this is a close second.
Homer1975 14
nobody was wrong about marriage, it's kinda life for everyone ,find out yours
musikchik 6
You should point that out to her! Don't just let her talk smack, tell her how it is.
aladdin2502 7
She's jelly
newburton13 26
Happy Anniversary, then.
Dcm210 19
Is it really worth getting married if you gonna have to go through divorce? Waste all that money.
thorned_rose 0
Don't listen to her
SuperDanielNL 23
Put a shit-filled diaper on her head.
skyeyez9 25
Apparently, your mom thinks marriage is all about getting a divorce and starting over every few years.
ribbons 23
You know what they say about starting over, finding and/or re-inventing yourself. I'm sure the past marriages were associated with some seriously bad phases, each more horrible than the last (the "cheetah-print" phase with Steve; the "go-go boots are for EVERYday" phase with John; the "I'm gonna be a body-builder" phase with Bubba; ...) and the divorce was a form of ending that phase. For OP's mom, maybe 'finding herself' is the same as 'finding a man'?