Today, my dog accidentally crapped on her leash. When I flicked the leash to get the poo off, it went flying. Have you ever had warm poo hit you in the face on a cold day when there's 6 inches of snow on the ground? I have. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was walking dogs for the animal hospital I work for. I accidentally dropped the leash, and in my haste to retrieve it, I frantically grabbed the ground. I got the leash, and a handful of fresh dog poo emitted from the dog I was walking. FML
Today, my dog decided to take a poop at the top of an icy hill. Being a good citizen, I went to clean it up. Guess who slipped and wore the poop all the way down the hill… FML
Today, I was picking up after my dog with a poo baggie over my hand, like a mitten. Too bad the bottom ripped open and my bare hand poked through it just as I grabbed a big handful of steaming dog turd. FML
Today, while walking my dog in the darkness, I bent down to pick up his poop. I screamed like a little girl as his morning turd leapt up my arm, covering my hand and jacket sleeve in soggy poop. My dog had curled one out onto a dozing frog. I skipped breakfast. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when, as usual, he did his business in the grass and stepped off to the side. I squatted and reached for the bag when my dog spotted another canine. He lunged forward in excitement and I landed face forward in the feces. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he did his business. He then stepped all in it and coated his paws. As I was struggling with him, I slipped and landed butt-first into his steaming pile. My boyfriend nearly fainted from laughing. FML
Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML
Today, while trying to pick up dog poo, I tripped and landed in the pile. FML
Today, I stepped in a pile of dog shit. While trying to get it off by wiping my foot on the grass, I stepped in another pile. FML
Today, whilst walking to a primary school to give pupils a lesson on cleanliness, I tripped and landed on a dog turd. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Yulia_fml 0
this gives a whole new meaning to the child's insult "poo-poo head" and why does the snow matter?
epound28 0
how did your dog shit on the leash? did you have it wrapped around it's balls? and even so, what the **** goes through your head that makes you flick the leash. flick it. what the ****? and what the **** does the snow have to do with warm shit making love to your facial pores? YDI OP, YDI.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (62)
Fortitudine 3
LMAO
jenniferchaify 11
Ewwwww
rachilio 26
I no sucks right?
Fylminesawsome 5
Bet tgat steaming hot pile of shit.felt good on that cold day??
Fylminesawsome 5
Bet*
Fylminesawsome 5
Lol... That* anti-flood protection sucks the big hairy cheezeball
alchemist27 13
I've read 2 thing about dog poop lol idk which 1s worse
hhejwbnpo 0
Just don't get pink eye
StayatHomeSon 9
Talk about getting shit faced...
Jazzie0210 8
Today you earned a flying shit. ;)