Today, I was going to bleach my bikini line, as I have not been able to shave there due to some ingrown hairs, and I also have to lifeguard every day. As it turns out, I'm allergic to the bleach. There is now an angry red, burning rash on my crotch that you can see around my swimsuit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, because I have a beach party tomorrow, I used a new gel that is supposed to prevent razor burn after shaving the bikini line. Turns out I'm highly allergic to the gel. Now I have hundreds of beautiful red bumps that look like razor burn. FML
Today, I attempted to bleach my body hair so I wouldn't have to shave. A little while later, I realized that I'd also succeeded in bleaching my skin, which was incredibly noticeable. I'm hosting a pool party this weekend. FML
Today, I found out the reason I've been itchy for the last two weeks is because I'm now allergic to chlorine. I'm also a swimming instructor. FML
Today, I decided to take a relaxing shower. My face mask made my face break out in hives. While exfoliating, my nipples became chafed. Then I slipped and cut myself while shaving. FML
Today, I had an allergic reaction to my deodorant. My armpits wouldn't stop itching, and by the time my shift was over, they were raw and bloody. FML
Today, I used a new fragrance-free hypoallergenic laundry detergent for my underwear, as I have sensitive skin. I got a rash. FML
Today, I tried shaving my bikini area for the first time. I ended up cutting myself several times. I now have impressive razor burn, and it's incredibly painful to even wear pants. FML
Today, I discovered that I have developed an allergy to salt water on my face. Now, every time I sweat or cry, I come up in a bright red rash. I am allergic to my own bodily fluids. FML
Today, I was getting ready for a very unpleasant doctor's appointment. I got out of the shower and used a new body spray all over my torso and arms. Turns out I'm allergic to it and now my skin is on fire, so now I get to go to an already uncomfortable appointment even more uncomfortable than I'd planned. FML
Today, I went to the store and bought some cream to help with a sunburn I'd gotten a few days ago. What's worse than having red, peeling, and painful skin? An allergic reaction on top of it. FML
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Top comments
Jord111222333 0
wear shorts with your bathing suit... besides you supposed to test a small area of skin to see if you're allergic beforehand!
metonymy 0
Firecrotch?
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Comments (142)
skibum 0
You are probably not allergic. Bleach is a very strong base. A pH close to 12. It would be like pouring acid on your crotch. Nice work.
lolfish 1
a Ph close to 12 is an alkali... just throwing that out there :)
kitkatkelly 0
Not household bleach, there's stuff made specifically for lightening hair.
bexox 0
#64: Alkali = base. Which is what the commenter here said. And a burn from a strong base would be similar to an acid burn, which is also what they are saying.
nobody_special 0
Couldn't you just wear shorts? They have swimsuit pieces where they're more like shorts, or have a skirt sown on...
ofcourseitdid 0
wow and i thought i was the only one allergic to bleach
happylittleman 0
That better be a lame ass attempt at a joke.
mehwhateverr 0
Wear short shorts over your bathing suit?
DottiePalooza 0
Patch test, stupid!
InspiredByGaGa 8
YDI for not Brazilianing that bush.
rustyrox 0
time to get some board shorts
infowarrior 0
YDI, for being gross.
kellster 2
Definitely a time to invest in boy short bottoms! :/ Sucks, I'm sorry!
laviniaa 0
that's why you ALWAYS patch test!