Today, I told a story about a new mother naming her daughter after the first thing she saw moments after she was born. The group admins accused me of lying, with absolutely zero proof, and deleted the post. The story is 100% true. My mother and I witnessed it with our own two eyes and ears. Fuck these people. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother posted a video of me giving birth, on Facebook. FML
Today, my mother topped someone's story of their child's problems by saying I'm on drugs. This resulted in people showing up to stage an intervention for me. She made the whole thing up and I've never used drugs, but no one believes me. FML
Today, some girl's mom gave me a load of abuse for endangering her daughter's health. How? By deleting my Facebook account, which caused her to have a serious panic attack. Apparently she thought we were best friends, and that I was ditching her. I'm confused too. FML
Today, I mentioned to my mum that one of my friends is pregnant. She decided I was lying, that I'm the one who's actually pregnant, and that I'm going to get checked out by a doctor. FML
Today my mother met my in-laws for the first time. She had been an alcoholic and had us sent to foster care 15 years ago. My husband told his parents this behind my back a while ago. When they asked her about it, she denied everything. His entire family now thinks I lie for attention. FML
Today, my wife and I received confirmation that she has postpartum depression. When sharing this with the family, my mother exclaimed "I told you she was a psycho!" Now my wife is crying louder and more often than our newborn. Thanks, mom. FML
Today, my daughter posted a poem on Facebook about how her father and I abused her for years. It's a complete lie and an obvious attempt to impress her boyfriend, whom she thanked for "rescuing" her. I've received several hateful messages already, along with threats to report me to CPS. FML
Today, my father informed me that I was born only because my mom lied about being on birth control. FML
Today, my mom showed to my girlfriend my naked baby photos. My girlfriend said, "Nothing’s changed." FML
Today, after much reluctance due to fear of causing a huge debate, I finally posted something on Facebook about the presidential debates. However, the post sparked an argument with my mom's childhood best friend, that ended with her telling me that my dad isn't actually my dad. FML
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Top comments
Shalibear Williams 2
What was the name?
Yudith 28
And this is why we offer flowers to women about to give birth.
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Comments (3)
Yudith 28
And this is why we offer flowers to women about to give birth.
BurnInDemonFire 39
And this is how I ended up being named Thorn Thorne.
Shalibear Williams 2
What was the name?
tiptoppc 21
A friend of mine worked in immigration. They have pamphlets which inform incoming migrants of STD and health info. Sometimes native languages don’t translate directly to english, so they have to put a name onto the form that isn’t native. She’s seen almost every STD discussed in the health pamphlets used. Can confirm, I met a female named “Chlamydia” in High school (from a remote area of Africa).
raven_of_azarath 35
When I worked at a tanning salon in college, we had a regular who’s an elementary teacher in a poor school. She told us all the funny and weird names she’s had over the year: Champagne and Tequila (who were named after what their parents were drinking when they were conceived), Ezmoney, Abcde (ab-suh-duh), Jkmn (no-ell). My mom also knew a family named Fields when she was younger. The girls names were Barley and Strawberry. I had a student who shared a name exactly with his 3 older brothers.