Today, I bought some pricey lipstick for a date tonight. An hour after putting it on, my lips are so swollen, I look like a blow-up sex doll. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was getting ready for a date when I noticed a spot on my chin. To get rid of it, I applied my sister's spot cream rather than picking it off. Within minutes, my entire chin looked like a swollen tomato. FML
Today, whilst out shopping with my crush, I decided to jokingly try on a silly-looking dress in an overly-expensive shop. Apparently I took the wrong size as I couldn't get out. Not only did the shop assistants have to publicly cut me out of the dress, I had to pay for it. FML
Today, I went on a date. As I hugged him, I felt tingles. As a big believer in clichés, I thought it was the tingles of falling in love. Turns out, it was my allergic reaction to his cologne. I now look like I burned my face. FML
Today, I was applying Icy Hot. I squeezed the bottle too hard making it squirt in my eye. I ran to the bathroom in agony, turned on the faucet, and slammed my face right into it. FML
Today, I woke up with the worst vaginal itching and swelling. I then find out it was brought on by my boyfriend's cheap brand of toilet paper. FML
Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML
Today, I accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to take my bra off. FML
Today, I found out that licking your very chapped lips while totally zoned out and looking in the general direction of a girl, will end up with you becoming the massive college creeper that everyone avoids. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I had been talking to online for weeks. When I showed up, he looked nothing like his profile picture, and he spent the entire time talking about his ex-girlfriend. FML
Today, thirty minutes after the end of a great date with a great girl, she texted me, "Yeah, uh, never come near me again." FML
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Top comments
FlamingJazkinz 15
Just don't act like one and you'll be fine :D
danthehuman 29
Unlike a blow-up sex doll, you're still going on a date. :P
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Comments (55)
bmhampt91 18
Maybe your date is into that
klassicalkelly 21
I know this doesn't help with your date, but if you take the lipstick back to the counter you will be able to get a refund. To avoid it happening again, you should compare the ingredients of the expensive lipstick with your normal lipstick. This could help you identify the ingredient that caused the reaction.
LoveMyBoyz 9
what did u use? I have a tiny mouth & would love some bigger lips. was it a plumper or just a bad reaction? I'd just use less maybe if it's a plumper :)
Octopudding 17
More like dicey lipstick.
bellabea 10
I'd like a follow up to know what brand/color it was, to avoid buying it and having a reaction too. Maybe you got a bad one? Sorry op! :(
annalily5 28
It honestly is probably not be the lipsticks fault, just the bad luck of OP being allergic to an ingredient in it. You'd be better off keeping track of if there's a common ingredient in lipsticks that give you a reaction and avoiding it.
Dexter83_fml 17
You have to let us know how the date went OP please update us
Xion0014 20
Some guys don't find it...necessarily a bad thing.
suosi 21
Its ok, he/she might like it better
mbock 15
maybe he is into that stuff
yarani 26
Ah the Kardashian look! Now all you need to do is remove your brain and glue it to your ass