Today, my fiancé and I finally had the house to ourselves for the night for the first time in MONTHS, and we don't know when we will get a chance like this again. So, he texts his buddy to play zombies. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home to my fiancé and his mates playing Monopoly naked in our backyard. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I moved into our own house. He proceeded to invite his parents to stay for the week. The same parents we've lived with for the past 5 years. FML
Today, I overheard my husband telling his friend that he wished a zombie apocalypse would happen in real life, so he could take me out back and shoot me without having to worry about going to prison. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML
Today, my boyfriend finally called me after a week of barely any communication. He wanted to talk to my brother about Call of Duty. FML
Today, I'm staying at my boyfriend's house and things were getting heated when he got a call from one of his mates wanting to play Counter Strike. Next thing I know, I'm laying in bed by myself listening to him rage. FML
Today, my husband returned from being away for two weeks. I eagerly got myself ready and sent him a risqué picture so he would come to bed. An hour later, he's on the couch playing Xbox with the message already seen. FML
Today, a baseball bat fell on my head while my boyfriend and I were cuddling. The same baseball bat that he keeps next to the bed, because he genuinely fears a zombie outbreak. FML
Today, when I got home, the apartment was clean for once. I gasped in surprise, and my boyfriend came out of the bathroom, carried me to the bedroom, and brutally ravished me. Afterwards, I asked him what brought this on. "Well, I bought a new game and it took forever to download..." FML
Today, I was out apartment hunting with my boyfriend. We visited a marvelous place that ticked all the boxes on our requirement checklist, but my boyfriend was unenthused. There was just one small detail that I hadn’t factored in: it's very badly located if ever zombies attack. FML
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Top comments
Inkoseh 33
Well, if neither of you made plans for that night, you can't exactly blame him for doing something he wants to do? On the nights where our kids go to our grandparents, we just kind of laze around with takeout or something. We rarely get to have time for our hobbies, so we enjoy our hobbies side by side with together time mixed in anywhere. ;) Editing: Guess I should make clear that while it's a bum move on him, you two should talk to each other about it, and he most definitely should have asked what you'd like to do as well. But if he did and you replied "I dunno! Whatever!" Then he did 'whatever'. I've caught myself just saying that 'whatever' when I wanted to do something, but never spoke up. That was early marriage. We're almost 11 years in now!
slowhandjp 18
Time to ditch him.
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Comments (5)
Charlie Given 28
And that's when you walk out naked and tell him zombie this first then ya go play 😂
John Nemeth 14
He’s just preparing for the next phase of the apocalypse can’t blame him. God I miss That game “Zombies ate my neighbors”
Inkoseh 33
Well, if neither of you made plans for that night, you can't exactly blame him for doing something he wants to do? On the nights where our kids go to our grandparents, we just kind of laze around with takeout or something. We rarely get to have time for our hobbies, so we enjoy our hobbies side by side with together time mixed in anywhere. ;) Editing: Guess I should make clear that while it's a bum move on him, you two should talk to each other about it, and he most definitely should have asked what you'd like to do as well. But if he did and you replied "I dunno! Whatever!" Then he did 'whatever'. I've caught myself just saying that 'whatever' when I wanted to do something, but never spoke up. That was early marriage. We're almost 11 years in now!
genuinegoodguy 9
Something very wrong here.
slowhandjp 18
Time to ditch him.