Today, my girlfriend viciously chewed me out for not taking a sandwich to work to save money. I don't have a problem with packing lunches, but the store-brand white bread she insists on buying is disgusting. She won't listen to me, and refuses to let me buy anything else. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tried baking my own bread to save food money. Unfortunately I screwed it up, prompting my wife to look at me pityingly and say "Wow, can't get even bread to rise." before walking out. I have erectile dysfunction, and she constantly insults me like this. FML
Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit because I snatched a couple of her fries for myself. She regularly raids my snacks, takes food off my plate, and has even stolen my work lunches, but a couple of fries is too much to ask. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML
Today, I burned dinner because my girlfriend was yelling for me to help with a trivial problem. To salvage things, I ordered pizza. She spent the rest of the evening moaning that I ruined dinner, that we don't eat healthy, and that I "make us" waste money on food. FML
Today, my girlfriend screamed at me for throwing away her food, calling me a sick, controlling psycho. When I pointed out that the seafood pasta I tossed was a week old and almost certainly rotten, she dug the box out of the trash and ate it to prove a point. Now she's got food poisoning and somehow it's my fault. FML
Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for changing my phone's password, like I thought she would try to access my phone without telling me. When I pointed out she could only know I changed it by trying to unlock it behind my back, she took the sandwich I'd just made and fed it to the dog. FML
Today, my girlfriend is angry with me. We had an argument on how to properly eat an Oreo. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw a bitch fit about her clothes not fitting and how she’s “so fat” to the point of storming out of the house when I asked her to please calm down. Just a couple of hours earlier, we'd ordered food and she ordered a salad, then asked to trade my burger and fries with her. FML
Today, after my girlfriend continuously whined for hours about a specific burger place, I finally gave in and we drove nearly two hours to get there. Once in line, she looked at the menu, then decided everything had too many calories and wanted to go home. She doesn’t get why I’m pissed. FML
Today, I’ve always tried to be understanding that my girlfriend grew up very poor and is therefore extremely frugal. However, I finally had to draw the line when she flipped out on me for throwing out her respooled used dental floss and buying another. It was 98 cents for a new one. FML
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Top comments
Shzusuziq11 12
maybe stop somewhere and buy the bread you like?
HayNow 11
Or grow a pair just buy the bread you like, take it home and if she doesn't like it, she can kick rocks
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Comments (6)
Shzusuziq11 12
maybe stop somewhere and buy the bread you like?
Anderling 33
If there’s enough room to stash it at work, you can just buy bread and a big jar of peanut butter or jam or maybe sliced cheese or something, and make a sandwich at work as required. Money saved, girlfriend shouldn’t be mad then.
Anderling 33
Is the brand she buys also the cheapest one in the store? Something smells fishy here with her level of insistence on saving money.
RichardPencil 32
Buy the fancy-schmantzy bread you like and keep it in your desk at work. Replace the nasty cheap white bread at work with the good stuff, and feed that trash to the birds. Or,... Maybe grow a pair and stand up to your girlfriend and make her make your sammiches with the bread you like and no spit!
HayNow 11
Or grow a pair just buy the bread you like, take it home and if she doesn't like it, she can kick rocks
cpguru24 18
YDI for putting up with it.
Hangryko 32
YDI for not buying your own bread.