Today, I got fired on my second day on the job. I'd said that I was the former manager of a Sears that had permanently closed. Thinking they wouldn’t call and verify since it was closed, I put it on my resume. Turns out one of my coworkers used to work there for 10 years and said he never heard of me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was fired from a job I didn't have. The manager in charge of calling me to tell me if I got the job never called, and never called me back when I left messages. The only time he called me was to fire me for not coming to orientation, which, by the way, he never called to tell me about. FML
Today, I was fired for the second time in as many days. I received a letter notifying me that I would no longer be working for the company, effective immediately. When I did not attend work the next day, I received a phone call firing me for not turning up. FML
Today, I was fired on my second day of work after a year and a half of unemployment. Apparently, my "tendency to solve problems instead of just accepting them made the other workers uneasy". FML
Today, I got fired from my job because I closed the store 84 seconds early. They found out because the state manager was sitting across the street with binoculars watching me. FML
Today, I got fired after three days at my new job. They told me it was because of downsizing. They were still interviewing people and had a help wanted sign in the window. FML
Today, I found out the reason I can't get a job. My previous employer didn't know my name, so when places I applied to called there for a reference, my boss said he had no recollection of me working there. FML
Today, on my first day of work, I got fired after 45 minutes. FML
Today, I got fired from my new job. It was the start of my third week, and I got fired for not opening the store. The manager forgot to give me keys to open the store, and was two hours late. FML
Today, I was fired for actively seeking employment with another company. Because of having just been fired, the other company will no longer give me the time of day. FML
Today, I won employee of the month. I was then fired for being late. FML
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Top comments
dreams2383 20
you can't lie on resumes anymore. they always call the companies to verify now.
kitten79TX 5
Never lie on a resume. smh.
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Comments (6)
poopface82 25
I don’t know too many stories with a happy ending that involve lying on one’s resume.
kitten79TX 5
Never lie on a resume. smh.
dreams2383 20
you can't lie on resumes anymore. they always call the companies to verify now.
RichardPencil 32
And such a boring lie, too!
Sonotsuave 37
Yeah, idk how this will ever be an fml. YDI 100%