Opportunist
Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML
Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw an elderly woman in need of help of crossing a street. I helped her across. On the way she just about fell and held onto me to keep from hitting the ground. After she left on her bus I reached for my wallet. It was gone. I had just been robbed by a 70 year old. FML
Today, I was riding my bike to work in a hurry and hit a pothole. I flew off and hit the ground hard. I was badly shaken, but an old lady came over, checked me out and helped me to my feet. After she left the scene, I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet while "helping" me. FML
Today, I was on my bike. As I'm rolling through an intersection, some asshat in a pickup runs the red light and hits me. Instead of getting out and helping me, the guy hops out, takes a look at me lying in the street, steals my hat and drives off. That was my favorite hat. FML
Today, while riding my bike on the sidewalk, I came across a ladder. To avoid bad luck, I swerved around it into the street. I got hit by a car. FML
Today, I was was leaving the library when I noticed an elderly woman being mugged. I was about to leave on my bike, but promptly went to help her. After I managed to scare off the mugger, I helped her to her car. As I was heading back to my bike, I notice the mugger riding off on it. FML
Today, at a red light, an old lady crossing the street fell right in front of my car. I got out of my car to help her. The light turned green and I was still helping the woman to her feet. An officer came by and ticketed me for "impeding the flow of traffic." FML
Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen, so I went to work. On my walk to work, a girl pulls up on my bike and says I needed to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. She hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass before police surrounded me and accused me of stealing my own bike. FML
Today, I saw an elderly man struggling to make it across a busy street. I jumped up from my table at Starbucks to help him, leaving my things behind. When I got back to my table feeling good, I found that my coffee had disappeared. So had my wallet. FML
Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML
Today, when I crossed the street, I almost died because of a careless driver, but when I crossed it again on my way back, I got hit by a bicycle. FML
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Top comments
lolnikki 0
That sucks :(
MJD_fml 0
Altruism is selfless concern for the welfare of others. Take comfort in the fact that the reward for your deed is internal. Externally your phone and your bike were only material objects which can be replaced.
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Comments (787)
ssfchik17 0
i cant be sure if this is true, getting your phone run over and a moment later, having your bike stolen? i dont know anyone who is that unlucky.
RyanKaufman 7
I expect this on FML I stole this kid's bike when he was helping in old man, while I was laughing I hit a pole and flew into a police car, unconscious. I woke up in a cell next to a creepy guy and my parents are on vacation for a while.
mas19 0
Now you get a free update for your phone. :/
lynx43_fml 0
Well, you did do the right thing. You can replace a phone and a bike, but not an old man's life ;) But same thing, I feel sorry for you.... D=
KarmaPoPo 0
Yikes! Tough break homes, Craig's list has cheap bikes :-) Also, what are the chances, the old man and the person who stole your bike are in cahoots with one another?
pompompom_fml 0
you've been scammed, the old man was member of a gang who steals bikes never ever help an old man again
Death2_Daylight 0
Congratulations, you are truly a courteous and generous person. But lets just hope the elderly man wasn't "in on it."
DaKidd09 0
Wow funniest FML EVER!
hanners 0
daanng, that's what you get for helping others silly! sorry your life sucks :(
AlreadyExistsTH 1
Bikes are THE most common thing be stolen. Don't abandon them for a second.