Today, I was on a red-eye flight, and the woman beside me was chattering loudly to her friend. I opened my laptop and got to work. Suddenly, one of the women turned to me and told me that the clicking of my keyboard was too loud. She then called me an "inconsiderate, selfish bitch." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I boarded a trans-Atlantic flight by myself, and struck up a nice conversation with the passenger across the aisle. Before we even took off, the man in front of me unbuckled, stood to face me, and asked me to please shut the hell up. "It's a 9 hour flight, and you're VERY loud!" FML
Today, I was on a three hour flight to Los Angeles for a corporate meeting. The woman next to me instantly fell asleep and snored louder than a freight train, while the kid behind me made a hobby of thashing my seat from behind. When I peered over and asked him to stop, he spat in my face. FML
Today, I had my headphones on while on the bus. I didn't realize how loud the music was till the woman sitting next to me punched me for changing her favorite song and then "ignoring her" when she asked me to put it back. FML
Today, I was sat next to a screaming baby on a 9-hour flight. Now before anyone has a go at me, I am in no way blaming the baby, I’m blaming the mother with her makeup hair and nails done perfectly, with her AirPods on, staring at her phone, and ignoring her screaming child the full 9 hours. FML
Today, at the airport, a lady bitched me out for changing her departure gate. She called me incompetent and accused me of "messing with people's lives" by "making them walk." I didn't change the gate, and the other gate was less than 10 feet away. FML
Today, I was on a long-haul flight, desperately trying to sleep. My husband next to me started snoring so loudly, I swear he was vibrating the seat. In a dazed, half-asleep state, I leaned over and hissed, “Shut up!” It wasn’t him. It was the guy next to him. He woke up and looked at me like I was the problem. FML
Today, after two years of working from home, and being bugged by a relative every five minutes as I tried to work, I turned the tables by asking her something. I promptly got chewed out for interrupting something she was doing. FML
Today, I was sitting on a bus. I'm deaf. An old lady looked very angry at me and started talking. Then she looked like she was screaming. I had to type on my phone that I'm deaf. Apparently, I'd been stepping on her foot. She decided to poke me in the eye and type, "Now you're blind too." FML
Today, I joined a video meeting 5 minutes early and spent the time quietly complaining about one of my coworkers to my friend. When the meeting started, I realized my microphone had been on the entire time. Said coworker was the first person to say hello. FML
Today, my boss came storming towards me, screaming just how tired she is with my constant bullshit. Already pissed off, I retorted that she's a bitch and should go lose some pounds. Turns out she was talking to her husband on her Bluetooth headset. FML
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Top comments
Luckster 0
You see, that is when you close your laptop (be sure to save your work), grip it firmly on both sides, raise it, and beat the living shit outta her with it!!
JessiGoose 0
Wow, did you punch her in the head?
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Comments (123)
DasHaas 9
Stare for a few seconds, point at her, laugh like a maniac, then continue your work as if nothing happened.
Sakke 4
#25 wins. Do that, or just ignore the bitch.
zays 0
That would be sooo funny! HAHA!
skyeyez9 25
Too bad you didn't have gas. You could have leaned to her side, repeatedly farted and fanned them over to her. if she is calling you inconsiderate, you may as well go all out.
hooplasmeegle 0
That sounds like the bast plan! :D
perdix 31
She's right. Everyone enjoys loud chattering. It provides entertainment for the whole cabin. Computer noises just sound like the plane is malfunctioning and panics people into thinking they are going to crash and burn. Put the ******* computer away and enjoy the onboard entertainment provided for you!
amelia_moon 0
You're so defensive! Last time you were on a plane did someone shut you up for talking too loudly about your genital warts?
atty11 0
perdix is kidding. i guess you didn't catch the sarcasm.
Crysta_fml 3
You should have called her out on her double standards and shat all over her self riciousness.
atty11 0
hahahahahhaha lmfao
jazzmancarron 11
tell her that you'll quit the clicking when she shuts her cum receptacle. and i think it would have been worth the value of the laptop to bash her over the head with it.
Lucky_Adi 0
I would've smashed my laptop on her head...
grrrarrrg2 2
I would of just typed louder
littlexlion 4
Man, you should have just smiled and nodded, and continued to type. :D
slyace 9
Irony: its a bitch lol You should taken her bitch ass down. FYL
I_deserve_nothin 0
i agree with 40, but instead of smileing and nodding u should of put the finger up and continued