Today, I was convinced I hadn't locked up properly when leaving work, and almost had a panic attack at the train station. I went all the way back into work, to find I had in fact locked up properly. It made me nearly two hours late home. This isn't the first time I've done this. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I freaked out when I couldn't get my bathroom door open. After ten minutes of panic when thinking about how I'd be stuck there for at least 8 hours until my roommate would get home, and another five mentally going over survival skills, I realized that I had forgotten to unlock the door. FML
Today, after being a few minutes late to work a few times this week, I left the house super early this morning. When I got to work, security hadn’t unlocked the doors yet, so I waited in my car, where I ended up falling asleep and sleeping through most of my entire morning shift. FML
Today, I went to bed early, feeling responsible. At 2 a.m., I woke up in a panic because I forgot to set my alarm. While fixing it, I actually turned it off completely. I overslept, missed work, and proved once again that I should never trust myself. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom at work. The lock on the stall door broke, and I couldn't open it. I was all alone and I started having a mini panic attack. After several minutes of frantically trying to fix the lock and hyperventilating, I realized I could just crawl under the door. FML
Today, whilst heading out the door to go to work, my lanyard got caught on the doorknob inside, and I watched my keys swing back inside as the door closed behind me. It was locked. FML
Today, after waking up in a panic because I was running late for work again, I realized I was fired for that exact reason the day before. FML
Today, I showed up to an important meeting 20 minutes late, claiming I couldn't find my keys. They were in my hand the whole time, and I realized it just as I reached for the doorknob. Everyone saw me pause mid-step, staring at my hand in disbelief. FML
Today, I got locked inside my apartment due to the locking mechanism being stuck, so I had to call off work. They refused to believe me, and insisted that I be in on time or else there would be disciplinary actions taken. Maintenance wasn't available till 3 hours into my shift. FML
Today, before leaving my house, I OCD-checked all of my doors 16 times to make sure that they were locked. When I got home, my house had been broken into. Turns out I accidentally unlocked my front door when trying to lock it for the last time. This is why I have OCD. FML
Today, in a rush to get out of my house to go to a doctor's appointment, I closed the door behind me without having my house or car keys on me. Sadly, it took me less than a minute to break into my own house. FML
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Top comments
DoubleCross 9
Better safe than jobless.
airforce987 20
You guys, it's not Alzheimer's or OCD or anything. All humans experience the phenomenon known as douchebag brain. Douchebag brain is the main source of short term forgetfulness, for example: you walk into a room and immediately don't know what you are looking for, or, it makes you always remember to lock your car (or in this case, business) but can't remember if you actually did it or not. We all get it guys...
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Comments (107)
Calyx_fml 22
OP, I locked up for you after I robbed the place.
flutter4 7
Sounds like you need some anti anxiety medication.
lonelyharts86 8
I've done that. I once woke up in the middle of the night 100% sure I didn't turn my alarm on before leaving. I think it's a sign our jobs are too stressful.
sorrowsangel89 1
This is what they mean by better safe than sorry
WoundsHeal 3
It's good that you check because what if the one time you don't check some one breaks in from the area you incorrectly locked
kriz_allizwell 6
Make sure to get a pic of everything locked and secure, every day, on your cell...that way you can remember better since you actually bothered to click a photo + u hav a pic so u can rest easy
zuelhater 7
You need another beer!!
EmoBitchRock 0
Well better safe than sorry! c:
xk75 4
I have connected the fact that I sometimes get super nervous about leaving the hair straightened on with another issue that is the true cause of my anxiousness that day. Op, is there something that you really ARE nervous about, and your brain just IDs the door lock thing bc it's an easy target?
Alastrina_fml 20
Try making a checklist of things you do to lock up and check them off as you do them, then be extremely mindful as you're doing them. Sometimes we forget about what we've done because we were distracted while we were doing it. [live in the moment, in other words]