Today, I took my 16 year-old daughter to get a bank account, taking her birth certificate with us as requested. When the teller wrote her name down on a piece of paper, my daughter said, "How do you know my name?" The teller just looked at her and held up her birth certificate. I raised a nitwit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend and I went to the bank to get her new ATM card. As the bank teller gave her the card, he said that the PIN remained the same. Indignant, she cried out, "How do you possibly know my PIN code?" She's 27. FML
Today, I had to slowly explain to my daughter why her Facebook profile isn't a valid piece of ID. FML
Today, I went to see a movie. While buying tickets, the girl behind the counter asked to show my ID card to proof I'm at least 16 years old. Not wanting to make a drama, I showed it. She took a look at it and declared it as fake. That ID is real and I'm 24. FML
Today, a man walked into the bank I work at and asked what he would need in order to open an account. I had to look him in the eyes with a straight face, say, "Two pieces of identification," and ask him to put some pants on. FML
Today, my daughter was unable to take the SAT. They wouldn’t let her in, because, “no one told her she would need two forms of ID.” To be fair, she would have gotten a terrible score anyway, if she’s really that dumb. FML
Today, I took my 4 year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed, "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex." FML
Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML
Today, my sister and I look enough alike she was able to steal my ID to go and get a tattoo at 15 years-old. Our mom is furious and also blames me, as though I willingly let her use my ID. FML
Today, as part of my becoming an adult, my dad taught me how to use an ATM. The irrational anger I suddenly felt when he told me to "Enter your PIN number into the ATM machine" is too much to be described here. FML
Today, my 17-year-old employee accidentally called me "Dad". We all got a good laugh from it and went on with our days. Later, after getting her some coins for her cash drawer, she playfully said, "Thanks, Daddy." The customer she was serving? My wife. FML
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Top comments
MyPupRox 2
shes a keeper, dont worry, theres always clown university ;)
ilovefall10 21
Am I the only one who feels sorry for the daughter? I mean , maybe she wasn't paying attention or maybe she spaced out a little. I think her mother saying ' I raised a nitwit' is a bit harsh. She's your frigging daughter woman.
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Comments (205)
TalkinSmack 6
atleast u know she's a nitwit
Weetart 8
You should have took the birth certificate and slapped her with it. Maybe that will have knocked some sense into her. In this case slapped into her. Lol
KayleeFrye 39
One stupid comment does not make someone stupid. I doubt there's anyone in the world who hasn't said something idiotic at some point in their lives. Intelligent people can have airhead moments, I know I have! Of course, if the daughter regularly makes dumb comments like this, then she is probably just a moron. :)
felixshen 18
True, but I guess if her own mother calles her a nitwit, she's probably a nitwit.
pink_raindrops 26
Some parents are just incredibly harsh on their kids. More than likely she wasn't paying attention to what was happening since her mom was there setting it up. I never used to pay attention to boring stuff like that when my parents were there because it didn't really matter to me.
maphineRAWRS 10
common mistake
rawrcookiemonste 5
lol it's not that bad.. maybe she was trying to be funny?
Garytt 0
I would of done the same thing
howslife123 0
forget birth certificate. maybe birth control would have been a better option.
RayRayIII 0
do the world a favor and smother her in her sleep that way she's not a burden on society
gabe2014 0
yea we should all kill people who say stupid things like me, you, and the rest of humanity right? idiot
teameminem 2
the apple doesn't fall far from the tree...
brianjman14 23
Nitwit? Really?