Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML
Today, I was doing some fun scat play with my boyfriend when the fire alarm went off. We both had to scramble into the shower to rinse off, clogged the drain, and left dirty footprints all over the apartment. Then we forgot to turn the shower off and came back to a flood. FML
Today, thanks to my habit of peeing in the shower, I accidentally peed in the bath. FML
Today, my father-in-law decided to "fix" our bathtub and ended up flooding the bathroom. Later, in his attempt to clean things up, he walked, without permission, into my bathroom where my vibrator was right next to my hairdryer. He definitely saw it, and didn’t say anything to me. FML
Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML
Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML
Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML
Today, I flooded my entire kitchen. The water was cut off at night and I left the faucet open without realizing. When the sound woke me up at 5am, the water reached my ankles. I frantically tried to sweep it out before my mother woke up at 6am. I didn't make it. FML
Today, I went to the place I signed for yesterday to pay the first month's rent and get my keys. I looked around before I left, and used the toilet. I went back later to show my boyfriend and found the place flooded an inch with water coming from the toilet. It had been flooding for 7 hours. FML
Today, after just having used the bathroom, my ring fell in the toilet. After stealthily removing it with a toothbrush, I went to go wash it in the sink. It then fell down the drain. FML
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Top comments
JiggaJayZ 16
He didn't ask to clean your pipes too did he?
barlessprison 16
Sounds like the start of a porno. Plumber arrives, you realize you don't have enough cash to pay him. You ask if there's another payment mode and voila, anal beads conveniently appear.
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Comments (160)
phoenix310 7
Dafaq did I just read
flockz 20
*walks by FreshPie and coughs obnoxiously* hey asshole! some of us have breathing conditions! smoke somewhere else! *doesn't actually have breathing condition/ just enjoys making people feel guilty* yes welcome to FML.
Not_Impressed13 9
Bums a smoke from FreshPie..
Adhdkid107 9
I am not impressed at your comment not_impressed13
wjh100 13
wonders why fresh pie can't spell cigarette. then makes fun of him for smoking shitty ass american spirits
ajeppsen 25
DocBastard gives lecture about how smoking is bad.
jeepers_1 21
There's a good chance he didn't notice, probably more focused in his job. And if he did oh well! It's really none of his business
lollypop30001 19
Let's just hope he didn't use them on him self lol
SoulAmeliorate 16
Plumber: "another one..."
Glitter_taco_ 10
Well... I don't I don't know how to respond to this...
isteadymob 4
Then why did you respond to this?
TheNinjaBacon 8
So don't.
Lunasis 14
gotta love those ones that have nothing at all worth saying yet have to say something anyways...
ShinedownLuv 14
It's alright! He's used to dealing with things that have been in another persons ass!
Pstraka6 20
Don't even sweat it, Im sure he's seen worse! And its not as if you see him every day, heck you may never see him again!
strike2867 13
"It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower." I'm sorry, what do you mean by finished? Were you missing the anal beads while he was finishing?
CharresBarkrey 16
Finished fixing her bathroom plumbing. Seriously?
stoych 19
Well, depending on age and experience he may not have known what they were? Some of the older generation tend not to get involved with sex toys and as they don't look particularly 'sex toy' like you are probably ok....... If not then just feel assured that your buttbeads will be the subject of drunken conversation down the pub....
NocturnalCro 14
Very nice.