Today, I attempted to fix the annoying squeak my office chair has been making with WD-40. I turned it upside down, but misjudged the intensity of the spray, spraying it on my laptop keyboard. Now my “S” key is smoother than ever, but I can’t type the word “stress” without it sounding like a snake. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tried to fix a squeaky door myself after watching a five-minute tutorial. I sprayed lubricant into the hinges, opened the door, and felt proud of myself. Then I noticed the entire floor underneath was covered in tiny black drops. I'd apparently used the wrong spray. FML
Today, I tried to clean my keyboard by turning it upside down and shaking it. Something important apparently fell out, because now the “E” key only works if I smack it hard enough to look like I’m typing angry emails. My coworkers are concerned. FML
Today, I decided to be healthy and drink a tall glass of water whilst doing my assignment that is due in three days. I managed to spill the entire glass over my laptop. I flipped it over and used a hairdryer to dry it off. While doing that, I managed to melt my keyboard. FML
Today, I was sitting at the computer when this really annoying fly kept landing on the keyboard. After a while, I took the bottom of a pen and squished it. Twenty minutes later I absentmindedly started chewing at the bottom of the pen. FML
Today, I found out that you can ruin a $500 computer with a few stray drops of 100% acetone nail polish remover on the keyboard. FML
Today, I was setting up my keyboard when the stand came loose. The keyboard started to fall, so I tried to save it, held it up in the air, and ended up falling off the stool onto the floor. I’ll feel that tomorrow, but at least the keyboard survived. FML
Today, I tried fixing the squeak in my bedroom door. Instead, I made it dramatically louder. That night, when I sneaked to the kitchen for a snack, the door shrieked like a horror movie prop. My family thought someone broke in. It was just me craving chips. FML
Today, I fell off my desk chair. Why? I failed to notice that the screws I'd been finding on the floor around my room for the past few months belonged to said chair. FML
Today, I was in a quiet meeting on Teams using noise-cancelling AirPods when my coworkers started giggling. I assumed someone’s mic was acting up. Turns out, my mic was on, and the mysterious squeaking noise was my chair… or so I thought. Nope. My dog was also behind me licking a balloon for some reason. FML
Today, I sat down at my computer for the first time in a week, and discovered that my cat had thrown up all over my keyboard. I needed to write up an important document but the chunks were stuck down in the keys, effectively locking it up and making it useless. FML
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