Today, I saw a moth trapped in a spider web. Feeling gracious, I gently freed it, and then took it to the window to let it out. When I opened the window to set him free, my $300 air conditioner fell two stories and smashed on the sidewalk. The moth flew away. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got up and started getting ready for work. As I entered the bathroom, I noticed a moth in the shower. Feeling generous, I caught the moth in a cup and took it to the front porch. I released the moth and watched it fly away… into a giant spider and its web. FML
Today, a moth was flying around my house. Annoyed, I picked up a shoe to crush it with. The moth landed on a light fixture on the ceiling, so I made my move. Dead, the moth slipped gracefully through air and onto my head. So did the light fixture. FML
Today, I woke up after a long night of trying to catch a moth. I'd knocked down furniture and screamed up the house to do so, but I finally got it. What did I see first thing this morning? Another moth. FML
Today, I opened a window that had been shut for a couple of months. As soon as I did, dozens of tiny baby spiders blew in with the breeze, and dispersed in my kitchen. FML
Today, I saw a wasp on the ground, apparently injured and unable to fly. It was being mobbed by ants and looked certain to die, so I stamped on the ants to save its life. At this point it sprung up, stung me, then flew off. FML
Today, there's a moth in my house, who either does nothing, or flies around like it just ate enough sugar for one lifetime. Every time I see it, I think it's a wasp and, being deathly afraid of them, I go into a full-blown panic attack until the sight of it bumping into light bulbs brings me back to reality. FML
Today, I was washing dishes when I picked up a plate and saw a huge spider. Trying to be nice, I took the plate outside and tried to gently push the spider off. The wind blew it into my eye. FML
Today, I finally conquered my fear of spiders by catching one in a cup and releasing it outside. Feeling proud of my bravery, I proudly showed my accomplishment to my roommate, only to realize it wasn't a spider but a piece of lint. I screamed louder than I would have for a spider. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Today, I saw a small bug on the wall, so I decided to send it straight to the insect afterlife by smashing it with a book. The book crushed it, and caused my clock to come free from the wall and crash down onto my TV. FML
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Top comments
suaveneanderthal 0
what the hell did you think the moth was going to do? Upon seeing your precious air conditioner the moth was supposed to go out and buy you a new one? "The moth flew away" what a great way to end that story, i was expecting it to suck your balls in gratitude, not selfishly get the **** away from the place that it had first been trapped and then had been freed by a ****** giant.
teiso_fml 0
Why is the life of the moth more valuable than the life of the spider?
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Comments (152)
monkey314159 0
Now the spider is gonna starve...
necrobese 0
****** ass Mormons.
lazytown 0
I'm glad you didn't expect the moth to fly away. Seriously?
babylon_pride 0
Calling BS. If only for the reason that if you could open your window with your air conditioner in it, then that means it wasn't screwed in there, or held there properly. And it would've fallen out a long time ago, or at the very least moved enough that you would've been worried and remembered it was there. And as you were opening the window, it would've been hard to do so considering the lip of ACs stop it from being so damn easy.
Slolo420 0
You saved a life, and removed some carbon from your carbon footprint. Thanks for your part in keeping the world green :)
feelingblue 0
poor spider no more food
MagneticGuitar 0
Yh, YDI for messing with nature and screwing up the food chain.!
penisface69 17
i hope you left a snack for the spider.
kaleid0scopeEyes 0
I love it when people try to defend things like keeping a colony of spiders in their house...don't lie you keep them there because they are your only friends
crazyderrub 0
hahahhahahhahahahaha, but yeah fyl.
roosterman187 0
Slolo420-- I don't even know where to begin. You're hopelessly foolish. The OP took food from the spider, and had food taken from her, in some form anyway. Karma's a bitch. Hippies...
lucidpattern 6
I thought karma was something only hippies believed in?