Today, I went to a café and got some soup. When I was done, a nice waiter came over and offered to take my mostly empty soup bowl. I quickly ate the last of it, looked up smiling and said, "Thanks!" The soup dribbled out of my mouth and onto his hand. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to my fiancé's house to have dinner with his family for the first time. Trying to be polite at the end of the meal I went to take the plates in to the kitchen. I overestimated how heavy the half-finished soup pot was, and threw soup all over myself and future mother-in-law. FML
Today, a waiter came up and and put out his hand so I gave him a high five and pounded it. He then says, "Um, that was a nice high five but I wanted your plate." FML
Today, I tried to be nice to a cute girl at the café by holding the door open for her. I smiled, leaned on the door frame, and poured my entire cup of coffee down my leg. She still said thanks before walking away. FML
Today, I went out for dinner with some friends to a new restaurant. As I was finishing the soup, I noticed a small curly hair at the bottom of the soup. The chef is bald. FML
Today, I was eating chicken noodle soup for my lunch. It was perfect until the last bite when it went down the wrong pipe. Choking, I coughed up what I'd already eaten. In front of my coworkers, and all over myself. FML
Today, I was working as a waitress at a wedding. I was trying to clear the tables as quickly as possible and decided to place a half bowl of soup on top of the pile of plates I was carrying. As I was hurrying back to the kitchen I tripped and spilt the soup all over the bride's ivory dress. FML
Today, I was sick and laid up in bed, and my boyfriend decided to bring me some soup. Just as he reached the bed, he tripped over his own feet and spilled the soup all over me. FML
Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML
Today, I was bringing a table a bowl of soup at my waitressing job. A new customer taking off his coat threw his elbow out, violently knocking the soup out of my hands and onto his baby in a highchair. The baby screamed; I had a panic attack. FML
Today, I was eager to learn how to use chopsticks, as I was in a nice Chinese restaurant and had ordered noodles. As I was visibly struggling to eat, the server brought me a fork. When I reached for it, I flicked a noodle into a lady's soup at the next table. FML
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Top comments
Xquisite1 28
Did he offer you a tip? Such as letting you know that you should consider wearing a bib perhaps.
chelsearenaeee 16
You just had to have that last drop.
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Comments (50)
ostfaiz 18
u should be frequent to that cafe Op, for a followup! Fyl indeed
vikky538 29
i feel you OP
toiletgod 15
What is this? It's neither funny nor interesting. Your life doesn't suck and you deserve nothing.
False_Stupidity 42
Sorry to be that guy, but I have a problem with the words " I quickly at the last of it," . Shouldn't it be " I quickly ate the last of it,"?
CheerBaby97 9
For future reference, try swallowing liquids (and any other food for that matter) before you open your mouth to talk.
thatgirlinoregon 21
Countdown till someone corrects the spelling error with an asterisk in 3...2...1...
Erery 16
As long as you left a good tip ;) he'll get over it
singer0421 32
"I quickly at the last of it." Nice. Not to mention the period is outside of the quotations, and there's no Oxford comma (though not necessary, it is preferred).
ohSNAPyall 27
Not only did she leave him a big tip, but she also shared her meal with him.
kcgatsby 8
modest ever.