Today, I was in the cafeteria when I noticed a new worker cleaning a table. As I passed her, she looked up and smiled at me. Thinking she was pulling a funny face, I jokingly crossed my eyes and smiled back. She looked hurt and continued working. Later, she served me my lunch. She was actually cross-eyed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was working at a portrait studio and was taking pictures of a little girl, I kept telling the girl to stop making silly faces when she smiles because her eyes go cross-eyed. After the third time I said it her mom grabbed the little girl and left. Turns out, she was naturally cross-eyed. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant, and I saw my friend. When we made eye contact, I made a creepy face at her and twitched my arms to make her laugh. A woman looked over said sadly, "Oh my God, that poor girl!" She thought I was "special." FML
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, as I worked as a cashier, two girls came up laughing. I smiled as I rang them up, asking what had made them laugh so hard. One looked me dead in the face and said, "You." They then both walked away, laughing. FML
Today, whilst in the break room at work, a girl I don’t know walked into the room. She gave me a look of utter disgust, then turned and walked back out of the room. I was so shocked, I burst out laughing. FML
Today, I was walking through the main lobby at school and I saw someone waving at me, so I waved back. Turns out she was just cleaning a glass door. I heard laughter behind me. FML
Today, I got up early and really put some extra effort into my appearance to catch the eye of a cute guy at work. I walked in and the woman who sits at the desk beside me looks over and says, "Wow, are you sick? You're not looking too good." FML
Today, I made eye contact with a very cute girl in a café just as I biting into a croissant. It crumbled so violently that a piece flew up into my eye. She just stared at each me in disbelief as I yelped and rubbed my eyeball clean. FML
Today, this really cute guy at work kept flirting with me and cracking the funniest jokes. Before he left, he told me how much he enjoyed making me smile. An hour later, I saw my reflection in a mirror, I had a huge piece of food stuck in my teeth. FML
Today, a woman was staring at me. This went on for about five minutes until I couldn't take it anymore. I screamed at her to cut it out. It turns out she had a lazy eye. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
julvett 0
She probably spit in your food...
Aciliveth 5
Oh man. I hope you apologized and explained yourself. And even then...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (174)
thelarkscaw 0
hahah I never know which eye to look at when talking to a lazy eyed person. or if theyre even talking to me...
donner1423 0
YDI for being mean irregardless of what you thought. Anger leads to unintended consequences...or something like that.
alayna100 0
the habit of making assumptions is a bitch
HELLOASHLEYLYNN 0
aw, that sucks. at least you didn't do it on purpose to hurt her.
breakthesky 0
Haha, nice.
MonkeyFeathers 0
did you at least apologize that poor woman
shirvon100 0
its his fault how would he know that she was actually crosseyed
Tregon 0
I agree with #7. Did you at least apologize? :S
irrelevantxx 0
Douchebag!
cabbage2689 0
wow. all i can say. opps.