Today, it’s my birthday. It’s 2:30 pm, and my parents are still sleeping while I watch television with my dog. I’ll probably also have dinner with my dog. Happy Birthday to me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it's both my 28th birthday and New Year’s Eve. Even though it's a Friday, tonight’s big plans are frozen pizza and going to bed early. I live with my parents and even they are going out tonight, leaving me to watch the dog. Happy Birthday, loser! FML
Today, it's my birthday, and everyone, family and friends, forgot. Except my dog who left me a present on my bed. FML
Today, it's my birthday. It's 6.30 pm. I'm still the only person aware of what day it is. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My parents wished me a happy one via text message. We live in the same house. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My mom didn't buy me a present, throw a party, or acknowledge the event in any way. Last week it was our dog's birthday, which included a party for all the neighbourhood dogs, and a cake for our dog, made out of bacon. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I spent the day doing nothing but chores, amongst which baking my own birthday cake. I was then so exhausted that I couldn't even stand my own company, so I ate the cake alone on the couch, watching TV. It didn’t taste great. FML
Today, it's my 25th birthday, I celebrated it by cooking my favourite meal for my parents and sister, while they watched TV and house-hunted for my sister. I have yet to hear a happy birthday, receive a card, a present or a phone call. Oh, and my parents are on a diet, so they complained my cooking wasn’t "on their plan." FML
Today, it's my birthday, and apparently my family forgot it. But one person didn't forget. My dog gave me a little present in my new shoes I bought for myself. FML
Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML
Today, it’s my birthday. My boss treated me to a day off work, except my mother called at 12:01am drunk as hell screaming, “Happy birthday” down the phone. When I finally fell back asleep, I awoke to my boss asking me to come in after all. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
brookerea 9
that honestly doesn't sound bad too me at all.....
pandaandthepitty 12
And your dog loves you more than anything in the world, trust me. People are just awful sometimes, but animals love unconditionally.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (7)
RichardPencil 32
I hope you enjoy your Snausages, Kibbles n Bits and Frosty Paws!
Michael Sawyer 11
are you a teenager? cause that was the last time that my birthday meant anything other than just being a year older.
brookerea 9
that honestly doesn't sound bad too me at all.....
pandaandthepitty 12
And your dog loves you more than anything in the world, trust me. People are just awful sometimes, but animals love unconditionally.
RichardPencil 32
No, they don't. They love you on condition that you feed them.
dreams2383 20
that's how birthdays are when you get older.