Today, I left work early, and discovered I was locked out of my house. I subsequently had to use a spoon I found on the ground to smash the bathroom window. I cut my leg on the glass when I climbed through. While inspecting the wound, I felt a lump in my pocket. It was my house key. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML
Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML
Today, I spent forty minutes trying to break into my own house after being locked out. After finally getting in through a small unlocked window, I discovered my keys in my pants pocket. FML
Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML
Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house. With no other available option, I decided to try and ninja my way through a window. However, as it turns out, I would make a terrible ninja. I now have a sprained ankle and a broken window. FML
Today, I thought I'd locked my house keys in my locker at work. Not having any replacement nearby, I decided to cut the padlock with the saw of my pocket-knife. It took 20 minutes and four cuts into my hand to destroy the padlock. It took another five seconds to find the missing key in my jacket. FML
Today, I accidentally locked my car and house keys along with my phone in my car. Then I had to break into my own house looking for the spare. Someone called the police and I had to explain that I lived there. I forgot to grab the spare when I went to talk to the police officers I locked the door behind me. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house so I texted my cousin to come over and help me get in. She came over, stood on a chair and lifted me through the smallest unlocked window possible. Sadly, this was my bathroom window and I ended up head-first into my toilet. FML
Today, I wanted nothing more than to go home and get into bed. While I was unlocking my front door, the flimsy key snapped off inside the lock. A locksmith was called out, who did nothing but sadistically guffaw at my misfortune and crack sarcastic jokes as he undid the lock. FML
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Top comments
NippsSlipps 10
Checking your pockets for keys before you break a window usually works. But that's just me.
Airman1988 9
So you managed to search the ground and find a spoon but not your own pocket for a key?
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Comments (144)
heyyy464 1
Did you even try looking for your keys? Or was it just your instinct to give up on the keys and go for the spoon?
Twigz666 18
Why wouldn't you check your pockets before breaking the window? Common sense usually kicks in before you attack a window with a spoon.
kateindeed 5
There are so many things wrong with this FML. What is your window made of, rock candy? Must have been hell to break a window with a damn spoon..
lsd_25 8
haha i love when stuff like this happens
LadiDi_fml 10
...to others?
amypatel21 2
Think much??
twaumat 28
im guessing you never lock the door? so never bothered to check if you have the key?
iamesauce 4
I totally see where the OP is coming from, though. Typically. before I check my pocket for a house key I find a spoon randomly laying outside my house, gouge out a window pane and nearly my femoral artery in the process. It's just so much easier than going through the terrible task of going through my pockets.
mollysbp 0
Sucks having to climb through bathroom windows :p
nattynatters 14
You have talent ma'am.
Amberrae23 2
lmao. fyl. you're an idiot.