Today, after some cajoling, I finally posed naked for my long-term partner and his Polaroid camera. After saying he would cherish the intimate snapshots forever, he almost immediately forgot them on a crowded bus. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in my new boyfriend's apartment for the first time. As I was flipping through his photo albums, I came across one full of disturbingly candid pictures of me. I found some as early as my trip to the state fair, three years ago. I met my boyfriend two months ago. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were looking through an old photo album of mine. I turned to a page with a picture of me on my last day of college. I thought the picture was quite nice. He turned to me and said, "Don't worry, I take bad pictures too." FML
Today, I developed a roll of film I'd had sitting around for years. It was all images my ex had taken of him scrubbing his ass and toilet with my electric toothbrush, which I'd used for at least a month after our breakup. FML
Today, my dad gave me his old camera. I got home and eagerly turned it on to start using it. I was greeted by a photo of my father drunk, smiling, naked, and covered in peanut butter. FML
Today, a couple stopped me on the beach to take a picture of them kissing in front of the sunset. I agreed feeling generous, until they continued making out after the picture was taken, leaving me standing there awkwardly with their camera. FML
Today, my partner has been losing weight to get slimmer and took a picture of the scale. He posted it onto his Facebook and tagged me in it. After two hours we got messages from his family to look in the reflection of the glass on the scale and I was nude in the background. Thanks, Hun! FML
Today my boyfriend left his camera with me. I wanted to see the recent photos we took at the park next to my house. I scrolled through and found pictures of him and his ex-girlfriend the weekend before at the same park, posing under the same tree we had taken a photo. We've been together for a year. FML
Today, I was taking a group shot with my friends when I asked a stranger to take the picture for us. He backed up and told us to squish closer together, and when he was at least 20 feet away, he turned and ran off with my camera. FML
Today, while I was showering, my 3 year-old son came to the bathroom and put on all my makeup. Once I got out of the shower, I got a camera I had and took a few adorable shots. Afterwards, I sent the images to all my friends and family. Then I realized the reflection on the mirror was me fully naked. FML
Today, I was looking at my pictures and there are none of me and my boyfriend together. The only photographic evidence of our relationship are pictures of bruises he has given me. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Don’t worry. Only nice people who do not ********** ride the public buses. Your pics are safe.
J15237 25
Hey it happens and you said "almost". I am sure your man will cherish them, but men forget things. It happens. I think it was very nice of you to take the pictures for him.
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Comments (8)
RichardPencil 32
Don’t worry. Only nice people who do not ********** ride the public buses. Your pics are safe.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Basically, if you don't want people seeing you naked, don't risk it by having nudes taken. All those celebs who were hacked should have known this, and most people are aware of revenge ****, so even if you think it's a good idea to gift your partner something so intimate, stick with gifts that won't leave you humiliated. I guess you could try to pass them off as art, but if I were you, I'd leave the nudity to people who want to be seen nude. Or those who don't care either way.
Trinity Fenwick 7
he is soooo lying
saberjpg 6
There's no way this is true. Polaroid has been out of business for years. I doubt the camera's could even be operational if you still owned one.
nemcali 34
They are still in commerce. In fact since they are now vintage, they are also not cheap either. We used one at my friend’s wedding recently.
zeeba_neighba 10
Which bus again☺❔
J15237 25
Hey it happens and you said "almost". I am sure your man will cherish them, but men forget things. It happens. I think it was very nice of you to take the pictures for him.
T1A2Z3 35
I missed the almost. That's much better!