Today, I made huge pot of curry, adhering almost exactly to my proven and delicious recipe. It tasted completely bland, even with all the spices. I kept adding salt, until it tasted bland and oversalted at the same time. I think either the salt is broken or my taste buds are. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I spent all day carefully preparing a wonderful homemade beef and vegetable stew from scratch. Close to dinner time, I tasted it and it was inedibly salty. Confused, my horrifically bratty stepdaughter then laughed and admitted she poured salt in it because it wasn’t what she wanted for dinner. FML
Today, I made homemade pasta from scratch. I spent hours kneading the dough, rolling it out, and cutting it into perfect strips. When I went to cook it, I realized that I forgot to add salt to the dough. The pasta tasted like damp cardboard. FML
Today, I wanted to bake some chocolate chip cookies. As the first load was done, I tasted a cookie and it tasted too salty. Thinking it was because of the pinch of salt, I added more sugar to the batter, only to realize that the sugar I've put into the whole batter was actually salt. FML
Today, my mother-in-law came over for dinner. She decided to salt the food I was preparing without even tasting it first, then complained at dinner that I'd used too much salt. She then lectured me on the proper seasoning of food for the rest of the evening. FML
Today, I tried a new recipe for dinner. However, the recipe was written by someone with a penchant for overly dramatic storytelling. I spent the entire evening deciphering the narrative while desperately trying to salvage a dish that ultimately tasted like disappointment. FML
Today, I made Salt Water Taffy for the first time, misread the recipe, and put 1.5 cups of salt instead of the 1.5 teaspoons it called for. Needless to say it's inedible and I had to throw it away. FML
Today, my girlfriend invited me over to her family’s house for dinner. Every dish was packed with onion, garlic, pepper, and some spices I couldn’t even identify. I couldn’t actually taste the meat or the side dishes. All the nuance had been obliterated. I think they might not have taste buds. FML
Today, I hit rock bottom. I waited too long to go to the grocery store and am out of almost everything. There's no salt left. What can I even cook to be edible without salt? FML
Today, I went to make chilli and instead of just using 3 cups of water like the recipe called for, I ended up using 3 quarts somehow. Now I have a pot of hot and spicy meat water. FML
Today, in order to not upset my boss's autistic son who believes he is a chef, I had to choke down food that was both burnt and undercooked in the middle, contained way too much salt, and no other seasonings at all. I’m a real chef and I could feel my taste buds dying after eating that slop. FML
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Top comments
Azzi Harvey 3
have you tested for covid? x
TomeDr 25
Yeah… time to take a Covid test.
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Comments (10)
Azzi Harvey 3
have you tested for covid? x
TomeDr 25
Yeah… time to take a Covid test.
Hangryko 32
Get tested for COVID.
RichardPencil 32
Is it that Chinese salt, that isn't salt, but melamine?
rotflqtms_ 21
That sucks... Time to start contact tracing and quarantining. I think you caught COVID. Hopefully you have a home kit you can use to test yourself. Check off other symptoms, but loss of taste and smell is a huge one...and I hear even after recovering, you don't really get that back. Some of my coworkers have said their lung capacity has hit the fan. They can't do as much as they used to do without getting so winded even a year later. Good luck...and...don't offer it to someone else to test... you know, covid and all...
D J's MOM 17
I know someone who was completely asymptotic except for loss of taste. time to get tested.
Anderling 33
Reading this is straight-up painful. Quarantine and covid-test, right now.
notthatoldyet 15
Covid
Seashells77 25
Whenever something tastes undersalted, it usually needs an acid. Try some lemon juice or vinegar.