Today, I wanted nothing more than to go home and get into bed. While I was unlocking my front door, the flimsy key snapped off inside the lock. A locksmith was called out, who did nothing but sadistically guffaw at my misfortune and crack sarcastic jokes as he undid the lock. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML
Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML
Today, I paid a locksmith $100 after I locked myself out of my apartment. All he did was hit it, and it flung open. It wasn't locked, it'd just got stuck. FML
Today, I left work early, and discovered I was locked out of my house. I subsequently had to use a spoon I found on the ground to smash the bathroom window. I cut my leg on the glass when I climbed through. While inspecting the wound, I felt a lump in my pocket. It was my house key. FML
Today, I was helping a friend move. Before we arrived, he put his key on my key ring to keep it safe. When we got there, he promptly shoved my front door key into the lock and snapped it clean off. Not only can we not get into his house, but now I can't get back into mine. FML
Today, after numerous attempts, my car door still wouldn't unlock. After going ballistic on the lock, the key broke off inside. I then realized it wasn't my car. FML
Today, I was in and out of my room to cook dinner at 11:30pm and accidentally locked the door. I couldn't jimmy it by myself so called a locksmith who used two of those inflatable car door things and a screwdriver to pop it in 30 seconds flat. Cost me 180 bucks. FML
Today, I locked myself out of my apartment. I've just realized that I could have spent $30 on an Uber or Lyft to my parents' place to grab the other set of keys instead of calling a locksmith and paying $280 for him to drill a hole through my doorknob, rendering all my keys useless. FML
Today, I locked my keys in my car. After looking for the spare key for hours, we called our insurance company, who then sent a "locksmith" with a wedge and a bar to open my car. All he did was break the driver and passenger doorhandles. My stuff is still inside. FML
Today, after getting home from the supermarket, I went to unlock the door so my dad could carry the groceries in. No matter how hard or how many different ways I tried, the lock wouldn't shift. My dad eventually grabbed the keys, twisted once, and after the door unlocked, called me an idiot. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
You're paying him to unlock the door, not to be quiet. That's extra.
Sinamoi 18
You should've seen the Italian plumber who came to my house. He had a huge nose and wore this weird red hat, and CONSTANTLY talked about "saving the princess". Such a strange fellow.
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Comments (45)
vocaloidtiger 12
The same exact thing happened to my mom just right now... Except we had a really thick, solid key. It really does suck.
annie_nk 23
Bow chicka bow wow ;)
feldco1 17
Some people just get kicks out of others misfortune. Just ignore it and enjoy your sleep!
Bullpine 11
Why else would anyone be on this site?
docscientist 10
Its funny you say that on a site where misfortunes are posted for your amusement
elrcastor 8
Stinks for you!! i've busted a few keys off in a lock. Did you have a leatherman on you? it works real well at pulling the bust part of the key out of the lock.
salesman01 0
Get a smart-alarm and stfu!
lambda_fml 40
My last name is Smith. Im thinking of naming my son Lock.
annie_nk 23
Report him! That was really rude. Doesn't matter what the business is, it's common sense to be polite to your customers.
Shade1982 21
Is "report him" your solution for everything in the USA? Most locksmiths run their own business, so reporting him would be pointless anyway, otherwise he is still entitled to his opinion regardless. Although maybe rude, reporting him won't do anything.
TwoOneFive 11
Probably just a lonely job and happy to see people
BigSexy123 11
That did not sound happy. That sounded self-entitled and jerkish. I like the thought, though.
noncomposmentis 6
I feel sorry for you. Not fun AT ALL to be stuck outside your home in Denmark in this climate, with subzero temperatures at night, coupled with snow and wind...
Vidrill 22
"Guffaw" is a nice word. We should use it more often.
bexxiiee 11
At least he unlocked your door for you...