Today, my toddler bolted in a parking lot, running through lanes of cars, right past a man, and forcing me to drop everything I was holding and catch him. I gave the man hell, demanding to know why he didn't even try to stop my child from running into traffic. He just said, "Not my kid, not my problem." Asshole. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a toddler bolt in a parking lot. Since he was running towards the road behind me, I scooped him up to hand off to his mother. She shrieked, snatched him from my hands, and sprayed me with mace. While I was writhing in pain, some punk kid lifted my wallet and phone. FML
Today, my girlfriend's kid was acting silly and cutting up in a busy parking lot. I saw a car coming towards him and yanked him to my side. He started crying and my girlfriend screamed at me for "being mean" to him. I should have let the brat get hit, I guess. If this is the stepdad life, fuck it, I'm out. FML
Today, a guy drove straight into an intersection, running a stop sign and narrowly missing my car. I had to swerve into a snow bank to avoid him. He stopped long enough to see that I had a toddler in my car, before flipping me off and driving away. FML
Today, while in the yard, my 18-month-old son decided to take off running into the road, where a car was driving. I rushed after him, only for one of my dress straps to suddenly break without warning. It must have looked like I was trying to flag down the driver with my flailing tit. FML
Today, I was going into a store and saw a woman roughly handling a screaming toddler. I kept walking, until I heard the kid scream, "Help! You’re not my mommy!” I called 911 and stood behind the car to keep her from taking off. The cops arrived to see me fending off blows from a very pissed off grandma. FML
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
Today, a parent was too busy texting to notice her child had run in front of a moving truck. She did however see me grab the child's backpack to yank him back out of traffic. She then screamed at me for "manhandling" her child and demanded I be fired. It's not even my school; I'm a part time sub. FML
Today, at the park, a woman asked if I could watch her toddler for a second while she ran to the bathroom. Before I could answer, she ran off. Ten minutes later, a police officer approached me because someone reported a "man lurking with a child." I’m a woman. And not the babysitter. FML
Today, I had to chase down and tackle a boy (around 11 or 12) at my workplace after I caught him snatching someone's wallet and trying to quickly sneak out with it. Now everyone thinks I have something against children, even after I returned the stranger's wallet and explained that the little brat is a thief. FML
Today, I noticed a young child wandering out onto a busy street. I managed to grab his arm just as he stepped off the sidewalk and yank him away from almost certain death. My reward was his mother, who was on her cell phone the whole time, screaming at me for touching her child. FML
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Top comments
mike3775 39
Sadly, the way society is these days, I wouldn’t dare touch anyone else’s kids no matter what either.
FluffythePink 23
Why is a complete stranger who was minding their own business responsible for YOUR child in anyway? If YOUR child is a runner, why don't YOU use a wrist or back pack tether? Woman, I can smell your entitlement through my phone. Grow tf up and put your spawn on a leash.
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Comments (7)
mike3775 39
Sadly, the way society is these days, I wouldn’t dare touch anyone else’s kids no matter what either.
DLBL 23
You gave an innocent bystander hell. YOU are the asshole for not keeping a handle on your kid.
Charlie Given 28
Chivalry is dead because of people like you!
FluffythePink 23
Why is a complete stranger who was minding their own business responsible for YOUR child in anyway? If YOUR child is a runner, why don't YOU use a wrist or back pack tether? Woman, I can smell your entitlement through my phone. Grow tf up and put your spawn on a leash.
stickyface 17
You gave him hell for not intervening. 99.9% sure you would have called the cops on him if he had. Nobody in your world can win whatever narcissist game you're playing, and of course, it's their fault.
Hangryko 32
Sounds like classic deflection of accountability from an entitled parent. It can't be *your* fault your kid could have gotten hurt because your hands were too full to stop him from bolting, it's someone else's! If you can't keep your child safe and teach him how to behave in public, leave him with family or hire a babysitter while you run errands. Otherwise, as someone else suggested, use a wrist or backpack tether.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Oh joy, another entitled parent. I'm sure when that kid is at home, you just give him a tablet and leave him alone. Do your job as a parent and watch your kid. Put him on a leash if you have to. The guy's right - it's not his responsibility. It could be common courtesy, but it's not his job. It's yours. Do it better.