Today, I saw a girl on the subway that I knew so I started waving frantically. She gave me a really weird expression and moved quickly away from me. Then I realised that I only knew her because I had stalked her Facebook once. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on the computer in the library on campus. I was Facebook-stalking a really cute girl that I often see on campus. As I'm looking at her profile pictures, I turn around and the girl is standing right behind me. She gave me a disgusted look and walked off. FML
Today, I went to my Calculus lecture, one of a class of 200 people. As I looked down I noticed that a guy a few rows in front of me was on Facebook. When I took a closer look, I noticed he was viewing my profile. He stalked the profile for a full 45 minutes. I have never met this guy in my life. FML
Today, in a crowded store, I waved at someone who looked familiar. The woman frowned, looked behind her, then back at me, and said, “Do I know you?” I panicked and said, “Yes… spiritually?” She walked away faster than I’ve ever seen flee. FML
Today, a classmate at college accused me of stalking her. All because I walked past her house. I was walking to the supermarket. FML
Today, I waved at someone across the street because I was absolutely certain they were my friend. They waved back, so I walked over. We stood there awkwardly for about ten seconds before I realized I had never seen this person in my life. Apparently they had waved at the person standing behind me. FML
Today, I decided to reach out to someone I'd met randomly. I found them on social media and sent them a message. After telling my SO, he pointed out that that was stalking. I'm a creep now. FML
Today, I noticed a girl looking at me on the train. Playing it cool, I decided to give her a smile and see what would happen. It came out as a creepy, seedy grin, prompting her to call security. FML
Today, I received a message from a weird guy that's been stalking me online. Apparently, he travelled 4 hours last weekend to go to the same event as me, just to stare at me. He knew a LOT of details. He never spoke to me because that would "have been weird". I don't know what he looks like, so didn't recognise him. FML
Today, on my way to work, I was checking my hair in the semi-reflective window of an office building. I suddenly realized that the guy I had a one-night stand with last week was standing on the other side, looking confused. He now genuinely believes that I am stalking him. FML
Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from a girl I've had a crush on for a while. As I was about to accept it, it vanished. She explained later that she clicked on my name by accident, and didn't actually want to be friends at all. FML
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Top comments
Shikamaru_fml 11
YDI creep
enoughgrace 4
leave the stalking to the corn, fool!
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Comments (67)
alexhoney 0
That's just weird. Why would you make such a fool of yourself? You most certainly deserved it.
eftup 9
Facebook is for tards, nuff said!
OhShuttup 0
you're a retard, enough said!
Lovepeace18 0
its not stalking if u only saw her page once
Lovepeace18 0
its not stalking if u only saw her page once
my2centsworth 15
Creeper much?
liyah0618 0
You need serious help!!
Dez31396 0
creep
andoprime 4
you must not have been much of a stalker or you would have remembered her a little better than you did lol....... creep
Xxxcookie123xxX 0
Wtf creep
InBetweenDreams 0
If you thought you actually knew her, you must of stalked her page more than once. :/ Creeper.
Brittneyyyy 7
I was just about to say this! Creeper.
Proudmary 2
Sometimes I would randomly remember a person's face that I saw only once in passing, even though normally I barely remember any faces, even ones that i've spend prolonged amounts of time with. it happens.