Here comes the bride… By Anonymous - 05/06/2026 00:00 - United States Today, I realized that I may have made a mistake in getting married, because he kept telling people to "Stop fucking crying, it's not a funeral." FML I agree, your life sucks 306 You deserved it 120 Share Tweet Share
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. He got on the bed on all fours and crawled towards me, saying "My precious... my precious" in Gollum's voice. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 473 You deserved it 7 626
Today, I went to class with my bag packed for a weekend trip when it began to vibrate violently. Stopping mid-lecture, the professor approached me and asked politely if I could turn off my cell phone as I was disturbing the other 150 pupils in the class. It was my personal vibrator. FML I agree, your life sucks 12 516 You deserved it 47 223
Today, I called my insurance company begging for a new doctor. All my current one does is prescribe antidepressants for everything. Migraines? AD! Dizziness? AD! Birth control? AD! I’ve been having rough periods and I’m pretty sure she’s just trying to push pills to bill us more. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 312 You deserved it 96
Today, I'm officially at the point where I would do literally anything to have a pleasant dream, or at least one that's not absolutely fucking terrifying. I now know where the irrational fear of sleeping comes from. Anxiety can go fuck a duck. FML I agree, your life sucks 733 You deserved it 127
Today, I married my wife a few weeks before deploying to Kosovo as a military peacekeeper. She was a young Christian whose father, a pastor, performed our wedding ceremony. Before I got home, she told me that she and her cousin were lovers and that she used the money I sent her to file for divorce and pay for their honeymoon. FML I agree, your life sucks 925 You deserved it 123
Today, someone told me to be the adult in my kid's unexplained shunning of me. She’s 30. I just spent 3k on a graduation party. No thanks from her. Yes, I’m a dope. FML I agree, your life sucks 311 You deserved it 161
Well, it's his funeral now. What an asshat.
Annulment now.