Today, I went to the doctor. I had a spider bite that had been getting progressively larger for days. I had been putting Neosporin on underneath the bandage that was on it. The doctor saw my wound and laughed. He said the spider bite was no big deal, but that I was allergic to the Neosporin. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went through the nightmare of having to go to my doctor so he could remove a living spider from my nasal cavity. FML
Today, my skin was turning black, and I believed I was reacting to a spider bite. I spent 4 hours waiting in an emergency room in the middle of the night, paid a $100 copay, and missed a night with my boyfriend just to have a doctor wipe dye from my brand new black jeans off with alcohol. FML
Today, I was with my kids. We saw a tiny little bug and they started freaking out. Trying to show them that bugs are not scary, I picked it up. It bit me and now I have to go to the doctor because my hand is the size of a balloon. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for what I thought was a persistent bug bite. Turns out it was a mole I'd never noticed. I had been scratching it then applying anti-itch cream for weeks. FML
Today, after getting home from being in the field for a week, my wife who's a nurse, convinced me I had a spider bite on my penis. After rushing to the ER and standing nude in a cold exam room while the ER staff checked me out, I learned it's just an ingrown hair. FML
Today, I got a bug bite on my boob. I scratched it so much it started bleeding so I put a bandaid on it. Turns out the band-aid had latex in it and I got an allergic reaction to it. The bug bite is still bleeding and the top half of my boob is swollen. FML
Today, I sliced my arm open on the weekend, patched it with a fabric bandaid. Had an allergic reaction to the bandaid, arm now swollen, blistering and keeping-me-awake itchy. Pharmacist's advice? "Oooh, that looks bad. Better put a bandaid on that." FML
Today, I now have a plantar wart, chigger bites, and a brown recluse spider bite all in the same foot. FML
Today, I finally went to have blood taken for an allergy test I really need. Afterwards, I had an allergic reaction to the bandaid they used on my arm. FML
Today, on the third day after I developed what I thought was gout for the first time in my 62 years, it turns out it was just a spider bite on my toe. My wife still thinks I had been drinking on the sly. FML
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Top comments
pippysthename00 0
Hahaha, I love this.
mattmag 0
Well, now you know. Stick to the old-school stingy peroxide stuff.
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Comments (76)
justdance45 0
Shit, that's gotta hurt.
nolasaints 0
ya. this isn't even a fml. it's just a ironic moment.
TiNyBuBbLeZ 0
they should make an app called "ironic moments of faggots"
Likian5 26
Bullshit this ain't an FML. It definitely SUCKS to be allergic to one of the most effective disinfectants out there...
pippysthename00 0
Hahaha, I love this.
pajamurao 0
haha when I read it, I was hoping he'd get Spidey powers at one point.
Ilovelife07 0
Yeah, not too bad, at least it wasnt on your junk or something
vroom_fml 0
Not FML status, just more of an annoyance really...
grlwitperlEring 0
Damn that sucks
ashketchummmm 0
laaaame as hell.
pippysthename00 0
#4, it never says where the spider bite was. For all you know, it could have been on his "junk".
PureGold 0
haha, I moderated this one xP lol who would have though that could happen? FYL indeed. I hope it heals soon!
Ilovelife07 0
#8, truth, idk why but i for some reason assumed it was on his (another assumption, or her) finger or something
Phallus_fml 0
Slap doctor's face for laughing!!!