Today, I was supposed to finally go out with my guy friend that I have liked for a long time. He told me he would text me, and after waiting for hours for the text, I finally got it. It said, "Guess what!? I just got laid!" He forgot our date, had it off, and I congratulated him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I dressed up for a date. After waiting for hours, sending countless texts and voice mails to my date, and thinking I'd been stood up, I remembered my date is actually scheduled for tomorrow. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy, who decided to rudely text message his friend the whole time. When I got home, I realized he'd been texting the girl he was going to hookup with after our date; she happens to be my roommate. FML
Today, the guy I've been flirting with for a week, and would be meeting in two days, sent me a message that he wouldn't be able to text me this evening because he'll be on a date. FML
Today, I woke up very excited because I was going on my first date with this guy I really liked. I dressed very nicely and went to where we were supposed to meet. I waited for about 2 hours. I called him to ask him where he was. He got angry because he was still sleeping and I woke him up. FML
Today, I was supposed to have dinner with my best guy friend, (He’s gay. It’s platonic) but he never showed up.I waited for 30 minutes in the rain, texted and called, but he’s not here. This is the day after he “pranked” me by telling me the guy I like likes me back. I have no idea what’s going on. FML
Today, I was in a movie when my boyfriend sent out a mass text saying that he'd just lost his virginity. FML
Today, to get my mind off being single, I texted some friends. The first one was going out tonight to work things out with her ex, the second told me about his amazing new girlfriend, and the third replied an hour later with, "Sorry, I was having sex when you texted me." FML
Today, the guy I've been madly in love with for ages finally asked me out. I excitedly said yes. I waited a half an hour for him to show up, with another girl and say, "Where's your date?" I was asked to go on a double date, but apparently he forgot to tell me. FML
Today, I was on a date with a guy I've been crushing on. In the middle of the dinner, he said he had to go get something from his car. When I asked what it was, he smiled and said it was a surprise. I waited for my surprise for half an hour. Then I decided to pay the bill and go home and cry. FML
Today, I was supposed to go on a date with a guy I really like. My friends convinced me that he was going to stand me up and that I should just stay home to avoid being hurt. He showed up; I didn't. My friends laughed at my gullible nature. FML
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Top comments
jet_fml 0
Were you going out as FRIENDS, or did you both agree that it was something more?
DameGreyWulf 1
Awwww, what? Who tells their opposite-gendered friend their sexcapades, anyway? Dunno, seems weird to me. How cruel, but maybe this means he's not worth it.
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Comments (104)
chicadominicana 0
one of my guy friends tell me about their sex life. only because he looks at me as a sister. and i of course i look at him as my big brother..even though he younger than me by a day :P but yea plus hes with my best friend so i would no what happends anyway, if i wanted to know or not.
unBrokenBeliever 0
If you were willing to congratulate him, you kinda deserve to get stood up for sex. If you don't have the guts to stand up for yourself and tell him how angry that must have made you, what makes you think he'll have any respect whatsoever for you?
lalocaqmas 0
at least yu know wat a dooche he is. lol
You_got_it_bad 0
Playerrrr.
nutter236 0
owned sucker
mikel81 0
QQ You were too slow.
Nate25 0
oh no he remembered... just decided to do something else
Emperor_Jim 0
YDI for being a pussy and taking too long to tell him how you feel. You snooze, you lose. And he gets laid.
a_borshunist 0
YDI for being attracted to a goatsewatcher who brags about his sex life right after having them. As if they were such rare and important occurrences that he had to tell the world, just to prove he did it. That's the kind of shit you mention a few weeks or months later when it's clear that you're reminiscing and telling a good story, not rubbing it in everyone's face that "holy shit! Surprise surprise, someone actually bothered to **** you! Whoooa dude that's so epic bro you win 34263452 man points!" Seriously, if he's so immature that getting laid is such a huge deal to him (not even good sex or sexuality, just being able to tell people he got laid), then you're an idiot with low standards for ever being attracted to him in the first place.
RachelUriah 0
What a great ******* guy.