Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my husband had bought my one year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML
Today, I found out my husband had a Pornhub account where he photoshops himself to look like a girl. The worst part is that I noticed he wore some of my maternity clothes in the pictures. I guess they were the only ones big enough to fit him. FML
Today, I found out my husband got my 22 year-old daughter pregnant. Not only that, he’s drained our savings on her including a new iPhone and Macbook, designer clothes and handbags, etc. His defense, in all seriousness, was, "She’s not even my biological daughter, chill out." FML
Today, I found out that my husband has been seeing another woman and my 16 year-old daughter once caught them while I was at work. She didn’t tell me about it because she was enjoying all the hush gifts, shoes, purses, and the payments for her BMW X3. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, I caught my husband trying on the sexy bra I bought to wear just for him. For shits and giggles, I made him try on my dress too. He looked better in it than I do. FML
Today, my dad came to my 8-year-old daughter's birthday party wearing a shirt that said "Small penis, huge dick." FML
Today, I was reduced to a blubbering mess at my baby shower. My mom bought tons of clothes, bibs, etc. Sounds nice right? Well, they all had sayings like "Daddy’s Little Princess" and "Daddy’s Girl." She knows full well my fiancé quit his job, changed his number, and disappeared without a trace 3 months ago. FML
Today, my daughter and I went to the mall. While we were looking for clothes, she walked away from me and touched a man on the arm and smiled and said "Hi!" The man freaked out and screamed at me for letting that "thing" in public and to "wear a condom next time." FML
Today, my mother-in-law thought it would be appropriate to give my five-year-old daughter some bedclothes with the Playboy logo all over them. FML
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Top comments
Drai Gray 8
our*
Kurliez408 32
Aw c'mon OP have a sense of humor, that's hilarious!
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Comments (12)
RichardPencil 32
Now we know where women with daddy issues come from.
Drai Gray 8
our*
bobsanction 18
Women say they want a man with a sense of humor until he starts doing funny shit.
Kurliez408 32
Aw c'mon OP have a sense of humor, that's hilarious!
Susan Yee 9
Truth hurts huh
Charlie Given 28
I'm going to say that's tacky as hell and not funny ,both of my kids were birth control fails but I wouldn't be so tactless as to glorify it, it would be funny on an older child like a pre-teen or an adult but that's bordering on asinine to put that on a baby 🙄
1known 34
A baby doesn’t care at all about what’s written on it’s clothes.
Mathalamus 25
They will in the future, if they see that picture.
limeychefboy 15
If you can’t take a joke you shouldn’t have joined😃
meghang220 14
Hahahahahaha that’s hysterical 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 LMFAOOOOO
J15237 25
That is funny. Just let your husband have some fun and then maybe find a funny shirt for him to wear. Or something you wear that pokes fun of him. Its all in fun and games. Enjoy married life.
Stacey’s mom 8
I don’t know