Today, for about the tenth time this month, I opened my mouth and was immediately told to, “Shut the fuck up” before I'd actually said anything. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized I could say nothing in my home without being interrupted, talked over, or the subject derailed into a 30 minutes monologue by my housemates. And they wonder why I'm so quiet all the time… FML
Today, my mother once again interrupted me and talked over me, as though I wasn't saying anything at all. Then she wondered why I remained quiet after she was done talking about her mother doing that. Must run in the family. FML
Today, a customer punched me in the face for repeating their order back to them because they thought I was making fun of their speech impediment. I have the same speech impediment. FML
Today, I was told to go fuck myself twice because I asked people to wear masks. Only a month and a half of this left. FML
Today, my toddler learned the phrase “Shut up.” He now loudly says it to anyone who speaks to him, including our elderly neighbor, whose only crime was complimenting him on his shoes. FML
Today, I realized anytime I try to say anything, relatives will talk over me, change the subject, or go off on tangents about ancient family history that I don't want to hear for the 1000th time. Yet if I interrupt them once, I'm the bad one. FML
Today, I was in the break room with my colleagues and our awful boss. As ever, he was talking trash, convinced that his jokes were actually funny. The window was open, and it was chilly. As he walked by it, I mangled my words and said, "Cedric, could you please shut your mouth?" FML
Today, while at work, a customer refused to speak louder, despite me asking her to do it several times. As a result, I took her order incorrectly. The customer then finally decided to raise her voice, but only to yell at me about my poor listening skills. FML
Today, I was on a work call when my coworker made an accidental Freudian slip. Thinking I was muted, I muttered, "That’s what she said." I wasn’t muted. FML
Today, during a Zoom meeting, I thought my mic was muted. I sighed loudly and muttered, “I have no idea what this guy’s talking about.” The “guy” immediately stopped talking and said, “If you’re confused, I can repeat stuff.” Everyone stared in silence while I melted into my chair. FML
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Top comments
Royal Sataness 4
if it's from one person, it's time to get rid of them. if it's from multiple people, it's time to stop and evaluate what comes out of your mouth that pisses off so many people. if everyone is an asshole, it's actually you
RichardPencil 32
Shut the **** up! That's 11 and it's only the 5th of the month.
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Comments (5)
RichardPencil 32
Shut the **** up! That's 11 and it's only the 5th of the month.
Royal Sataness 4
if it's from one person, it's time to get rid of them. if it's from multiple people, it's time to stop and evaluate what comes out of your mouth that pisses off so many people. if everyone is an asshole, it's actually you
sirrubberduckie 37
"Life does not stop and start at your convenience, you miserable piece of shit."
mccuish 25
Sounds like what my coworkers will say to me
Slim87R 7
And you put up with that, why?