Today, I played with the white dust on the counter at work for the last time. After a couple of weeks of arriving to a thin coating of dust over the counter, and drawing in it, piling it up and other such fun things, I met the guy who now does the earlier shift. He has a huge, dandruffy beard. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I cleaned my toilet. I had forgotten it was white. FML
Today, I was idly scratching gunk off the common computer while waiting for a meeting to start. It wasn't until the end that I realized it was dried snot. FML
Today, I painted an area I had carefully sanded, cleaned, and taped off. I pulled a fan out of the closet to help dry it faster. I turned the fan on, and a million dust particles flew off onto the wet paint. FML
Today, I came in to work and found the conference room whiteboards completely clean. My assistant had wiped all the white boards where I'd spent 10 hours writing the schedule for the next three months. I was going to meet with all the supervisors to finalize that schedule today. FML
Today, out of boredom, I decided to clean shave my beard and moustache for the first time in 3 years. My new nickname at work is The Crimson Chin. FML
Today, the last customer of the night shift handed me their money along with a wad of their hair. FML
Today, I shaved off the beard I had been forced to grow over the past 3 weeks due to forgetting my razor when away. Fifteen minutes in, with half my beard gone, I realised I had got a tan everywhere but my beard. I now have a large white patch on my face. FML
Today, I work at McDonald's. The entire crew, myself included, got visibly excited that we had new trash cans and dust pans. FML
Today, I had to clean out my husband's brother's room as he is moving. The room was filled with childish toys, mould and years of dust covered everything. Behind and under every piece of furniture were earwax encrusted cotton swabs, hundreds of them. Oh yeah, he's moving in with us. FML
Today, while at a work meeting, I finally summoned up the courage to share and express my opinions about unprofessionalism in the office. After the meeting, I went to clean up, only to notice in the bathroom mirror that I'd had a booger pasted across my forehead throughout the meeting. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Good thing you didn't play with the white dust on the floor by the urinal.
dul_fml 2
Goldmember wouldn't have wasted such perfect skin. EAT IT
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Comments (112)
Ninjaface 0
So that's what they're cutting drugs with now. Because nothing gets you higher than snorting some guy's dandruff.
Prawn_fml 2
'just ewww'? Man, you're a prude. I guess you never touch anyone else's skin at all?
lmaoatyourlife 0
It seems the majority of people on here take life WAY too seriously. OP - sucks to be you! I'd be feeling pretty sick myself if i was you, even if 80% of dust is dead skin.... ignorance is bliss after all.
startafire 0
At least it wasn't anthrax?
Lolrus 0
haha. thank u for making my day.
jmmtn4aj 0
dust is mostly composed of dead skin in most places so basically in this case the skin just came from a different part of the body. no biggie
georgie_sweetypi 0
who the hell plays with dust anyway? but ewwww thats gross..
klpryde 0
Yeah... this was an FML with an unexpected twist. Did not see that one coming
Brey1013 0
.... you're going to play with it again aren't u?
citycrazed25 0
First sentence sounds so epic