Today, I played with the white dust on the counter at work for the last time. After a couple of weeks of arriving to a thin coating of dust over the counter, and drawing in it, piling it up and other such fun things, I met the guy who now does the earlier shift. He has a huge, dandruffy beard. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I cleaned my toilet. I had forgotten it was white. FML
Today, I was idly scratching gunk off the common computer while waiting for a meeting to start. It wasn't until the end that I realized it was dried snot. FML
Today, I painted an area I had carefully sanded, cleaned, and taped off. I pulled a fan out of the closet to help dry it faster. I turned the fan on, and a million dust particles flew off onto the wet paint. FML
Today, I came in to work and found the conference room whiteboards completely clean. My assistant had wiped all the white boards where I'd spent 10 hours writing the schedule for the next three months. I was going to meet with all the supervisors to finalize that schedule today. FML
Today, out of boredom, I decided to clean shave my beard and moustache for the first time in 3 years. My new nickname at work is The Crimson Chin. FML
Today, the last customer of the night shift handed me their money along with a wad of their hair. FML
Today, I shaved off the beard I had been forced to grow over the past 3 weeks due to forgetting my razor when away. Fifteen minutes in, with half my beard gone, I realised I had got a tan everywhere but my beard. I now have a large white patch on my face. FML
Today, I work at McDonald's. The entire crew, myself included, got visibly excited that we had new trash cans and dust pans. FML
Today, I had to clean out my husband's brother's room as he is moving. The room was filled with childish toys, mould and years of dust covered everything. Behind and under every piece of furniture were earwax encrusted cotton swabs, hundreds of them. Oh yeah, he's moving in with us. FML
Today, while at a work meeting, I finally summoned up the courage to share and express my opinions about unprofessionalism in the office. After the meeting, I went to clean up, only to notice in the bathroom mirror that I'd had a booger pasted across my forehead throughout the meeting. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Good thing you didn't play with the white dust on the floor by the urinal.
dul_fml 2
Goldmember wouldn't have wasted such perfect skin. EAT IT
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Comments (112)
vicki1000 8
haha that's hilarious. also disgusting but you will lookk back later on and I'm sure you'll will find it hilarious too
yenidewi 11
yaixxxxxx ... that's disgusting ... !!!! lolz
daddysgirl8 21
Lord knows I hope you don't work at a restraunt/diner/bar.
gingerface81 16
I really hope you don't work at a food franchise
worldclassrager 41
Bring a duster...glad you said it was the last time...
HallahBackGirl 12
Burn everything.